The Aftermath Of You

Chapter Twenty Seven

"Your mother is really scary," Jack told me. We were seated in her kitchen with a celebratory glass of green tea in front of us. At last I had found another job working as a secretary for one of Jack's friends – and I'd finally got the haircut I'd been begging for: dyed black with pixie layers sticking out on end.

My mother had wandered away to light some more incense, which I felt quite horrified about. My skin had dried up from the continuous smoke, and I was feeling more and more like a salmon. I wondered bleakly if my skin had started to peel away to reveal the juicy layers of pink flesh underneath. My mother was like Madonna with her continual identity crisis. She was forever reinventing herself. This new look was 'Bohemian Chic'. And it was really starting to bother me.

"Don't worry," I told Jack comfortingly. "She scares me all the time."

We sat in silence. We could hear my mother hollering through the wall to my father, "WHERE DID YOU PUT THAT DAMN LIGHTER, GEORGE!!"

"DON'T SHOUT THROUGH THE WALL AT ME! COME IN HERE AND ASK ME POLITELY."

Jack caught my eye and whispered, "Is he angry?"

I smiled, "No way - this is him on a really good day." If Jack ever witnessed my father angry he wouldn't be waiting around to ask questions. We could hear my mother shuffling in to the next room and clear her voice politely before asking, "Do you know where the lighter is?" in a sweet feminine tone.

"In the Chinese dish with the flower on it," George grumped.

Jacks eyes grew enormous. "Which one?" he mouthed. It had not skipped his attention that there were more than a sufficient amount of nick nacks in my parents' humble abode.

"Which one?" we heard my mother ask.

Jack shifted. Finally he leant towards me and whispered, "Do you think she can read people's minds?"

"No, that's my grandmother," I whispered back. "My grandmother has these special talents. She can make it rain for a week if she puts her mind to it."

"Oh," Jack said. "I'm not looking forward to meeting her."

Lulu bustled back into the room lighting a stick of incense. "So Toni tells me you steal toilet paper from work!" Lulu laughted hysterically. "What a tight ass!"

"I never said he 'stole' toilet paper." I said hurriedly, noticing Jack's outraged gaze in my direction. "He just brings it home."

"Yeah, I bet. Just like he 'brings home' bars of soap. You know you can get a good bargain for soap and toilet tissue online."

I sighed. "It was only one time."

"One time a week!" Lulu laughed loudly at her own joke. And even though we didn't return the cackle and Jack's face had become a picture of misery she continued joking and laughing by herself for a good ten minutes longer.