Kissing In Cars | Kellic

Chapter 10

~Kellin's POV~
I stared down at Vic, trying hard not to gape at the scars lining his arms, his stomach. They were everywhere, and it was so hard not to stare.
Something's wrong here. This shouldn't be happening... he's supposed to be the innocent home-schooled boy.
I waited patiently for Vic to answer my question, but he wouldn't. Instead, he cried. His sobs shook his whole body, his cheeks were damp, as were my blankets. Not that I cared.

"Vic, please talk to me. I won't tell anyone."
I said in an effort to sound soothing. I probably sounded hostile. He shook his head violently.
"No, I don't wanna talk about it." "Please? I promise-"
"No. Kellin, shut the fuck up."
"I care about you, therefore I won't shut up. You'll have to make me."
Vic sat up then, pulling me into his lap. "Vic? What are you doing! I didn't mean it literally-"
he cut me off again, his lips crashing into mine forcefully.

I wanted to run. I wanted to hop out of this stupid boy's lap, I wanted to hide from Vic, from all my problems. When it comes to fight or flight, I'm a flyer. Apparently Vic was a fighter. I pulled my mouth from his just long enough to say, halfheartedly,
"Vic gawd dannit, git off uf me."
Before he kissed me again. This didn't feel right at all. I was the reason we were in this situation. If I hadn't made him take his shirt off...

What the fuck? I just learned what is probably his deepest secret, and I'm in his lap kissing him? What's wrong with me? What's wrong with him? Why am I not trying to find out? What kind of friend am I??
I put my hands on his broad shoulders, carefully detaching our mouths. Mine didn't seem to want to let go. I stared into his deep brown eyes, wondering what they had seen.  How could anyone so beautiful do this to themselves?
"Vic, please. I promise I won't tell anyone, just tell me what's going on. As your friend, I'm only asking for an answer I deserve."
He closed his eyes, opened his clenched fists. I couldn't hear him breathing anymore.
"Vic-"
"I said shut the fuck up. I don't want to talk about it."
His beautiful tenor voice had dropped several octaves, it sounded like solid rock now, rather than its usual melted chocolate texture.

What do I do?
I sighed in defeat. There was only one thing I could do.
"F-fine. But eventually I want some sort of answer. Can you promise me that?"
His eyes popped open.
"Sure. But not now. I promise you'll get an answer sooner or later." He paused, before adding:
"Can we watch the movie now?"

I stayed in Vic's lap, pressed against his warm chest with a blanket wrapped around us. He had chosen the first Harry Potter movie, to my relief. I was so not in the mood for some sappy chick flick- not when my life was becoming one. We watched it in silence, munching on chips and drinking straight from the two-liter. It would've been peaceful, under any other circumstances. The tension in the air between us was almost unbearable. I hoped it wouldn't feel like this forever, but...
How could I ever unsee that?

By the time the movie was over, Vic was asleep. Sometime mid-movie he had laid down on his side, allowing me to lay in front of him and play the role of little spoon. As the end credits rolled, I cautiously lifted up the arm he had thrown around me. The room was dim, but I could still see the faint scars, as well as newer marks I hadn't noticed before. I stared at his arm until my eyes were burning with exhaustion.

I was getting tired. I had replayed Harry Potter just to fill in the empty silence hanging in the air. I let my fingers trace the scars now that I was closer to sleep. I brought his forearm to my lips and kissed along the marks. I whispered sweet nothings against his skin, knowing he couldn't hear me, though part of me wishes he could.
"Goodnight, Vic."
I whispered finally, closing my eyes. His scars danced and waved behind my closed eyelids, his scent surrounded me on all sides. My last thoughts before sleep overtook me were simple, but haunting:
Can we ever be the same?

*****
Hi guys. I meant to publish this earlier, but I kinda forgot. Oops. Anyway, I published a new story called "Dear Cass". It isn't a fanfiction, but I have huge plans for it, so I'd appreciate it if you could check it out. I also apologize for the shortness of this chapter, it's really just a filler. And you haven't seen Kellin's POV in a while either, so. Thank you for over 100 views and almost 40 votes!!!
-Landon