Pillow Talk

Payback - B

Payback – B

After Sunday dinner, just as Jamie predicted, he had a better frame of reference for the he said, she said of the Henley case. Jamie spent the rest of the night digging into Trevor's college records finally uncovering numerous complaints against him. The look on Eddie's face when he delivered that news was one of relief and dare he say it, adoration. Jamie had touched her heart by going the extra mile. Nothing in Christina's story had changed, he'd kept digging because of her feelings that made her feel special.

Tonight, things had come to a head. Trevor had tricked Christina into going to the Williamsburg Bridge with him and there he'd tried to kill her. Jamie and Eddie, acting on Jamie's intel, Eddie's hunch, and a neighbor's testimony had tracked them there and intervened just in time. Since they had written their reports and headed for Eddie's apartment, she had been very quiet.

"What's wrong?" Jamie asked again and again but Eddie rebuked him with a flip of her hand.

"Come on, honey," Jamie said gently. "I know something is bothering you."

"I'm having a hard time separating home and work again. We said we weren't going to talk as partners outside of work anymore. We both had a horrible night on Saturday because of my inability to do that. I really hurt you and I can't forgive myself."

Jamie kissed Eddie's forehead. "You can still talk about what happened on the job if it's eating at you, Eddie. Let's..." Jamie thought a minute, "Pretend that I'm not your partner, talk to me like your boyfriend. We can separate it if we try. Pretend that all of this came down today, I don't know anything about it, other than that you came home upset. What would you say to me? What would you want me to do?"

Slowly Eddie recounted her fear at seeing Christina being held by Trevor. How angry she felt that it got to that point and they didn't stop that terror before it started. "I guess that today brought back bad memories of Jake. I was held like that, threatened like that and it did open that wound."

Jamie reached over and pulled Eddie close. "What are you doing?" she asked surprised.

"What I would do if you can home and told me that," Jamie whispered kissing her head. "I'm sorry you felt that way, sweetheart. I'm even sorrier you had an experience that would make this emotional for you. It is okay if you are reacting that way, you're human."

Eddie felt so close to Jamie in that moment. He offered her nothing but his love and support. "I don't want to react," Eddie confessed. "I want to be able to look at it like you...like my partner does, objective but I can't. I do remember those things, Jamie and I do react to them as a cop and..."

Eddie felt Jamie pull back. "Things? Eddie, is there something else I need to know?"

Eddie shook her head, "After Jake attacked me; he made a lot of harassing phone calls, left a lot of nasty messages. He said ugly horrible things about me, about my body. A lot of things that Trevor probably said to Christina. Those things hurt!"

Jamie kissed the side of Eddie's head. "I know they do. Eddie, I need you to know that if you had been more forthcoming with me, I would have had your back in that. I would have stopped all of that garbage in it's tracks, even though we'd only been riding together a few months. I need you to believe that."

Eddie rubbed her cheek on Jamie's shirt, "I do. I believe that. I wish I had asked for help then. Maybe I would feel better now."

"What if we talk about it now?" Jamie asked. "What if you got that off your chest? Do you think you could trust me with that memory?"

Eddie was surprised she had to think about that. She didn't want those memories or the things Jake had said to interfere with this blissful arrangement. They had an argument, but now everything was fine. They were holding each other, bonding and being close to each other, no hard feelings.

Jamie stood up, "You take a minute, you think about it, and I'll make some tea and we can talk if you are ready."

Eddie spent the next ten minutes weighing the pros and cons of talking to Jamie. It would be a major step forward in their relationship. Jamie returned with two steaming mugs and a plate of cookies. He sat down and waited for Eddie to talk.

"He kept grabbing my breasts, squeezing them and pulling at them. I think he thought it was like getting kneed in the crotch for a guy, that if he hurt me enough I'd let him do what he wanted to do. When I didn't he slammed me into the table, pulled my hair...I was crying, not from pain but from fear, I admit it. I remember thinking I wished I was on the job. If I was I'd have my gun, I'd have my dexterity, and I'd have my partner at my back."

Jamie wanted to hold Eddie but he let her keep talking. "I finally did, knee him and I ran to the bathroom. Even after he left I kept hiding. I remember hiding when my parents had colleagues over. Some of my dad's colleagues would...after my mother was gone, they would look me over and it was pretty clear some of them wanted more than business but Dad, he never let them near me. He fired people left and right for ogling me."

Jamie nodded, "Sure, he was protecting you Eddie."

"After...the next day, Jake kept calling me," Eddie continued. "He left messages on my voice mail, talking about me having fat thighs or a big behind, that he was glad I didn't get naked, I'd have made him sick, just things to hurt me and wear me down."

Jamie sighed, "Eddie, you know you are..."

"Oh, I know," Eddie replied quickly "But to someone that doesn't know, to someone that doesn't have the support I had in you...it can do damage. That's why I reacted that way with Christina, she needed to feel someone was listening."

Jamie stroked Eddie's hair. "Okay...if you need to do that in the future, if you think it's beneficial, then you do that. I will behind you one hundred percent, as a boyfriend and as a partner."

Eddie smiled, "I love you," she whispered. "I love you so much. I am so lucky to have you Jamie. So incredibly lucky."

Jamie closed the gap and gently kissed Eddie's lips. "I'm the lucky one..." he sighed into her mouth. As their kiss deepened the tea and cookies were all but forgotten. Jamie rose, barely breaking his contact with Eddie's lips. Tenderly, Jamie reached down and scooped Eddie up in his arms carrying her towards the bed, where he planned to remind her that even though some men touched to hurt and humiliate, other men, the right man, touched to honor, to cherish, and most of all to love.