Pillow Talk

Back in the Day

"I just don't understand what you have against it, Jamie," Eddie sighed as they sat down on the sofa to discuss her new "rabbi".

"I don't have anything against it, honey," Jamie replied. "I'm upset you didn't talk to me about it that's all. If you were thinking about this shouldn't we have discussed it first?"

Eddie sighed, "Yes, I suppose I should have mentioned it to you, Jamie but I know how frustrated you are about not being promoted. You talked about the Sergeant's exam a few months ago but you haven't even touched the book."

"I'm sorry I'm not more into this, and believe me there is nothing I'd like more than sitting in a car with my beautiful partner." Jamie leaned over and kissed Eddie softly. "I'll try to be more supportive if this is what you really want to do."

Eddie nodded and leaned into Jamie's chest, "It's not what I want necessarily," Eddie sighed. "It's just an option, Jamie. An option you don't have because you allow yourself to be handled so unfairly by your Dad. You should tell him you know what you deserve and that anything you get is on merit! I hate this for you!"

Jamie slid his arm around Eddie's shoulders, "Let's forget about tonight all right?" He kissed her temple. "You want to go for this, I'm behind you all right?"

Eddie nodded and turned so she was lying against Jamie's chest. Eddie let her eyes close thinking about work today. Being on patrol was definitely more thrilling, but thinking of a future, a family, the money was much better. Also, she had just as much education as Jamie, more than Danny and Baez, more than most of the detectives. Eddie would be lying if she said she didn't feel a little bored with the often humdrum nature of patrol. Still, the nature of a stakeout wasn't exactly full of thrills either.

Eddie felt Jamie playing with her hair and rubbing her arm, she felt tired and melted into his legs. "You want to go to bed?" Jamie asked. "You're exhausted. Was this why you were tossing and turning all week?"

Eddie laughed, "No, that was actually menstrual cramps. They were really bad this month. Sorry if it kept you awake."

"If you were hurting you could have told me, Baby," Jamie said softly.

"You were really tired, I wanted you rested and alert especially if I wasn't. It passed but I am tired...Let's go watch a movie in bed."

Jamie nodded, and selected Open Range as their movie, as it was his turn. He knew Eddie liked that movie as well. He laid down and pulled Eddie close, her head resting on his stomach as he stroked her back. He lived for these little moments.

Eddie dozed off just before the huge gunfight began. Jamie knew she enjoyed that scene so he turned it off, they could watch together tomorrow night.

Or so he thought...

The events of the next night were unlike anything Jamie or Eddie would have expected. Jamie never thought Eddie, his Eddie would reach over, take the keys out of the car, and flat out refuse to answer a 10-13. She knew how he was still battling with the loss of Joe. He could not believe that she did that.

For her part, Eddie couldn't believe how angry Jamie was. He had told her to find another partner, but Eddie feared he meant that for their personal relationship as well. Had she been so caught up in the Jeffers case that she didn't think of how Jamie would react? And was he so jaded about the work they did that he couldn't trust the other cops assigned to patrol to handle the call for assistance? Eddie wasn't sure what she was going to walk into as she put her key in the lock and pushed the door open.

Jamie was on the couch, in the dark, with a beer in one hand. The other arm was flung over his eyes hiding them from her view and the light from the window. Eddie took a breath and approached the sofa. "Jamie..."

"Eddie, please don't," Jamie sighed sleepily. "We had a hard night, it's ridiculous that this even happened. Please do your routine and I will do mine."

"Jamie, we have to talk this out," Eddie replied. "What happened tonight was a work thing, it's not personal."

Jamie swung up from the couch. "This time it is personal!" Jamie snapped. "Did you forget who you were with out there? My brother was a 10-13 once Eddie! I was a 10-13 once and no one showed up ..."

"No one showed up but me you mean!" Eddie snapped remembering the day he was referring too. "But today, eleven units showed up, Jamie. We had orders to follow. You are the one that taught me to follow the rules, to take care of my assignment..."

"10-13 trumps everything!" Jamie fought back.

"10-13 does trump everything on patrol, but we weren't on patrol tonight, Jamie. We were on a stake out. A narcotics detective or sex crimes or even property does not respond to every 10-13 there is and if you and I are ever detectives, we won't either!"

The truth of Eddie's words too Jamie back. If he did move up, how could he think of protecting other officers? There would be other Joe's and other Jamie's then too.

Eddie softened her tone and reached for Jamie, "I know that scares you. I know you see you brother every time you hear those words, not just Joe but Danny too, but Jamie...if something terrible is going to happen...then it is and we can't stop it."

Jamie's throat felt tight, "I know...but I can be there as fast as I can and do as much as I can..."

"I know." Eddie closed the gap but Jamie pulled away.

"Just give me space right now okay? " Jamie avoided eye contact with her instead focusing on the beer pressed tightly in his hand.

Eddie sighed getting up to change promising to check on him in a bit. She went to the bathroom putting on his Harvard sweatshirt and shorts.

When she returned to the living room what Eddie saw shocked even her. The beer bottle had been thrown against the wall, the table sideswiped, its contents now on the floor beside Jamie who sat with violent angry tears rolling down his face. As much as Eddie wanted to give in to Jamie's request for space, she couldn't see him in such pain and not go to him.

Jamie felt Eddie wrap her body around his, "I'm so sorry, Jamie. I am so so sorry."

Jamie knew in his heart that it wasn't the actions of today she was sorry for but that Eddie was saying she was sorry for the loss he suffered and the pain it caused. "I'm here, baby," Eddie cooed. "I'm here...ssh...I'm so sorry, Jamie."

Eddie felt Jamie's hands come up and hold onto her arm. Gently Eddie moved so Jamie was lying in her lap, letting the anger and pain he so long repressed come out in waves. Eddie was sorry her actions drove him to this, but thankful he was finally releasing the pent up anger and frustration.

In Eddie's arms, Jamie calmed down and eventually dozed off on her lap. Eddie stroked his hair, her anger forgotten at his pain...They would whether this storm like they had others, she was sure of it...