Wake up already this is reality

Chapter Fourteen

Hey! It's Ashlee, so exciting news guys! So it's March eleventh, and I haven't updated for a few days I think, but I have reasons, such as I was a lazy potato, and one more note, I have a new boy friend, CUE THE VICTORY DACE! Eek! It was so embarrassing asking him because I had one of my friends write him a note and give it to him during class, because me and her made a deal(It was Charlie)I would help her ask someone out, and she was going to help me, oh and Charlie and Piper got into another fight, half the school hates me and my friends, and people are annoying.

Quick little update, on the fourteenth of March though the seventh I will not be able to update stories or use the internet for awhile as it is for a challenge in English, our teacher is letting us chose to be able to get 50 extra credit points if we are able to survive about a whole school week without using electronics other then for school and communication uses. This story will be on hold until those days are up, but I could post over the weekend if I get bored enough, so yeah! Wish me luck and hope I live!!!!

Oh and I didn't mention this before, my boyfriend is James, I talked about him in the eighth entry, he is childish a lot, wears glasses, and has a weirdly cute shaped head. He's pretty fun to talk to, smart, and cute, he isn't the "bad boy" that every girl gets in the books where she changes him good, or goes bad for him, wait, I kind of avoided him the day I asked him out. I might not see him much as a boyfriend, but more of a really close guy friend, or at least that's that I'll tell my parents if they ever ask me. James, he is a weird kid, so yeah, I mean I like him, but I don't know if I am ready to say I am in love with him, better yet, madly in love. Love is such a weird word. People use it to willy-nilly, they go around saying they love people just to never talk to them again. I mean, I don't know how to know if I am in love or not, I mean, what if my mind just thinks I really like him? Or that my friends got me to like him, I don't know anymore! 

Ugh, I just want to go hide forever now, be in a corner for the rest of my life, sleep all day, hide all night. Oh and that bullying crap, most of us dropped it, and one girl who was the main one told me not to tell on them, and said,"If you tell on us, you'll be setting yourself up", and I replied with,"Same to you, you guys replied with just as mean words", and I know you are mean to some of my friends to the point of them wanting to die. How does that feel? Know people want to die just because the words they've say. I mean it's so pathetic, girls calling each other hoes when you've dated more people then the one you are calling a ho. Another thing, would you expect them to just sit there and take the words your saying, well, the bully does, but when they stand up for themselves, the bully runs and tells their friends about what the victim said, I mean, they don't even mention what they said, and now the victim is the one to blame, no one else, it's sad, we live in a mad, mad world. 

I want to just scream at everyone who is rude to people, I mean, what has made you this mad at someone, is it something your going though to were you think it is okay to hurt people with words, do they even know what they are saying, do they know the effect the words play? Stick and stones will break your bones, and words can always hurt you. 

Off of the bullying topic, I hope I can make it though the days internet-less, this will be an experience. I do really love English, and the teacher, Ms.Miller, is her name, she is so nice, but she is a true mother, but a fun one! She goes off on us sometimes, or at least the bad students, will I am alienated out of the bad kids group.  Ms.Miller says I'm quiet and a good student, I even am in the book club, and I seem to be one of the only students with self control, even though I am the one with ADHD, yet I feel like my whole class is ADHD prone, they are crazy. Liza got a sip of energy drink during lunch because we ate in the classroom, will, some students did, Raven, Neaveh, Emma, Alisa, and I were just a few students to eat in there, one boy named Coal, he had lunch detention, and the people in the room were so loud, Emma, Raven, Alisa, and I sat on the carpet eating lunch for mot of the time, I didn't eat much other then some chips, and then I read for the rest of lunch, eek! On part two of Hallow City, can't wait until the first movie comes out for the series! Oh and Charlie could get a new boyfriend, right after she broke up with her last, and that is the one I am helping her get, well, tried, to help. 

Oh and we also had a fire-drill during seventh, and it was so awkward because I could tell people were trying to be away from me, the look in their eyes, the way the jumped when they say me, I think they thought I didn't notice, but how do you not notice when the people who already hate you try to get as far away as possible, but lucky, some of those people had to walk around the track and we got the play, but unfortunately, I had to play, and we played softball, again, you know what? I am starting to think our gym teachers let us play that game so they don't have to keep an eye on us, I mean they were talking yesterday and didn't even notice them screaming cuss words at me! 

I just want to poor my heart out right now! It's so hard not to too! I mean, how do you keep emotions in so long, like, my goal for next year in seventh is to make it to where, I WON'T cry the whole year, not a single tear, in school at least. Oh, but wait, emotions are the only tears that won't shed, tears from pain, such as me getting physically hurt, yeah, those are allowed, but publicly crying is frowned upon now-a-days. It can be sad to look upon our world, see how much we have distorted children, clouding them with rules about emotions. Well, looks like I must go update other things, and bing-watch anime for two days stirght to be able to get five days worth of internet, oh and can't forget to browse Tumblr for hours, so boi!!