Haley's POV
It was about three weeks later. Ricky and I had finally moved all of my things into his apartment. Even with all of his support and the love of my new family, I was still recovering from almost ten years of self harm.
My family had just left for the store. I was finally home alone. Running out to my father's garage, I searched until I found the smallest screwdriver possibly ever made. Quickly, I unfastened the blade from a pencil sharpener I had. My adrenile was at an all time high, I was so scared they were going to come back and find me. Carefully, I put everything back in place.
Slamming the door behind me, I ran to my room and locked the door. Opeing my top dresser drawer, I found the box I had prepared to hold my new friend. I had meticulously planned out how I was going to do this. Pulling the lid open, I snatched the small bottle of rubbing alcohol inside and began to clean to blade. Once that was done, I finally took a deep breath to calm myself. I was alone, my door was locked, I could do this. Pulling the right side of my shorts up, I studdied the unscathed skin. I couldn't wait to change that. I had even thought long and hard about where to begin, my wrists were too obvious and I couldn't hide them from my family.
Resting the blade on top of my skin, I drew a deep breath, and began a habit that I trully believed I'd never stop.
"Babe, you okay?" Ricky asked as he folded a shirt and placed it in a growing pile on the counter. Shaking my head back into reality, I looked into his worried eyes.
"I'm great." I forced a smile onto my face. I knew something had to give.
When I was in highschool, my parents had finally had enough of me moping around and had taken me to the doctor's for testing. It turns out that I was clinically depressed. They had tried to force me to go on medication, but after two weeks, I couldn't do it anymore. They hadn't only taken away my depression, but they had also taken away almost every other emotion I had. Knowing that telling my parents that I didn't want to be on medication anymore wouldn't persuade them, I secretly flushed the pills everyday. Since I was a kid, I had been plastering a fake smile on my face. Around thirteen, I had decided that pretending to be happy for the rest of my life was going to drive me insane. So I stopped, I just let the emotions I had felt for as long as I can remember, out of their cage. And my parents didn't like that. I had promised myself that I wouldn't pretend for anyone ever again. And I didn't for about two years, until they tried to "fix" me. I didn't need fixing, I just needed someone to understand.
"You sure, you seem pretty distant." Ricky said, leaning over the laundry and squeezing my hands gently.
"I just am having a hard time with recovery. It's not easy after ten years." His eyes widened.
"That long, huh? I had no idea." We continued our folding in silence. Grabbing the full basket, I stood up out of my chair and carried them to our bedroom. It was really weird calling it "our's".
Going to turn around, I was stopped by Ricky slinking his arms around my waist and burrying his face in my neck. Letting out a giggle, I turned to face him, not breaking our embrace, and kissed his nose. Just then, Ricky's phone started to vibrate. I groaned and let him part ways.
"Hello?" He said, the annoyance obvious in his voice. "What? How?" There was a pause as the person on the other end responded. "Yeah, of course, I'll fly down. Bye." He hung up, slowly turning to face me.
"My uh- my grandfather died. I have to fly to Washington for his funeral." He said, I tear slipping from his eye and rolling down his cheek. Rushing over to him, I pulled him into a deep hug. I heard his sobs come from the depths of his chest as he let all of his emotions out.
"Shh... It's gonna be okay." I silently cooed.
"I leave tomorrow." He stated, pulling back and looking into my eyes with his now swollen pair. "I'll be gone for a week."
"That's fine, it'll be hard, but you do what you need to." Ricky nodded his head and leaned in to hug me once more.
"Thank you, so much." He said, squeezing me.
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Tomorrow came all too soon. After helping Ricky load his suitcases into his car, we drove to the airport in silence.
Parking the car, he looked over at me, my eyes filling with tears.
"No, babe, please don't cry." Leaning on the arm rest, he reach over and kissed me lightly on the lips.
"Be safe, please." I begged.
"I will. You too, if you need ANYTHING, call me or the guys." I agreed and he opened his car door. Watching him walk into the airport, I felt a hole growing in my chest. My other half was leaving.
