Puzzle Pieces

Addiction

Baby I was an addict
For the high that you gave
I took the good with the bad
For a feeling that had me enslaved
I couldn't get enough, it's true
Each day I'd fiend for my fix
Until you'd put me out of my misery
With your sweet toxic mix
I loved the pain laced with pleasure
My body screamed out for more
Sensations I couldn't measure
Left me weak on the floor
My head was rushing and racing
From my insane, crazy high
There was no moderation, no pacing
I took it all, drank it dry
But then you woke me from my haze
With harsh words so cold
Bringing me out of my daze
I couldn't cope with the feeling
And then my want turned to need
My mind was manic and reeling
Remembering warnings I didn't heed
Now I'm here tryna get clean
I'm tryna get off you
I'm tryna forget what we had
I don't wanna want you
But how can I even do that
When you're so intoxicating
But then again I knew that
When I started self medicating
I used you for the high
You used me for the head
I just couldn't say goodbye
But you did, and I wished I was dead
But you were playing with me
Came back and hooked me again
I let you with no problem
But I promise this is the end
No more vodka fueled nights
Or your kisses Swisher sweet
No more temporary highs
I'm beating a hasty retreat
I can't take what I've become
I cant even face the girl in the mirror
But I've gotta make these wrongs right
Before my dying breath draws nearer
I'm taking back the control
Im taking back my life
I'm done letting you scar me
With words that cut like a knife
I won't need you anymore
And that thought plagues you with fear
Fear that I'm stronger than you think and you're not needed here
I used you to escape
From things that I couldn't change
But I'm facing them now
And you're in my firing range
I'm done being a puppet
And played like a toy
I'm on a mission to restore myself
I'm looking to seek and destroy