Safe Haven

im not ready.

"Lilly stop ignoring him." Anoshinie sighed. Lilly walked out of Aaryan's room after tucking him in.

"What are you talking about? I'm not." Lilly walked to the couch and sat down with her legs crossed.

"You've hardly left the apartment in weeks! You made me get groceries twice and refuse to eat out at all!"

"What. I've been looking after Aaryan and he just got his stitches out like.... Yesterday."

"Aaryan got his stitches out 5 days ago." Lilly knew Anoshinie was right. She was avoiding Aman. She has been avoiding Aman since the day they kissed. Aman went out with Lilly like 5 times, he helped her look after her son in the hospital for a full day. Aman was everything but she couldn't do it. "Talk to me baba. I know you. Please?" Anoshinie asked sincerely.

"I'm scared Nosh. I'm so used to doing this all alone." Lilly pressed her hands into her eyes. "I can't let myself feel the way I feel about him okay. I'm not going to risk getting Aaryan or myself attached to someone else."

"You love him don't you?" Anoshinie asked bluntly.

Lilly froze for a second and then nodded. "But that is ridiculous. I shouldn't love him." Lilly replied quietly. Tears were prickling in her eyes as she fought off the urge to cry.

"Mama?" Aaryan stood at the doorway just watching her break down. His voice was small but it helped Lilly get out of the state she was in.

"Hey it's okay. Let's get you back to bed okay?" Lilly walked Aaryan back into his room and tucked him in bed.

"Mum." Aarayan whispered. "You should call Aman. He always makes you happy."

Lilly leaned down and kissed his forehead. "Goodnight buddy."

Anoshinie stood in the kitchen washing some glasses. "He okay?"

"He told me to call Aman." Lilly smiled.

Anoshinie grinned. "Oh, he is a smart kid. Maybe you should listen to him. Since you're not listening to me."

"I will.... When I am ready." Lilly said softly.