6 Minutes Wrestling with Life

Fish Hooked - Don't Take the Bait

Daniel: "You train to fight?"
Mr. Miyagi: "That what you think?"
Daniel: "No."
Mr. Miyagi: "Then why train?"
Daniel: "So I won't have to fight."
Mr. Miyagi: "Miyagi have hope for you."

The Karate Kid

September 13th, 2009

I am sitting in the bleachers of a high school gym some two hundred miles away from Jess's hospital room.

My body is in Connecticut, my mind and heart are in New York.

I spend the next forty-five minutes trying to merge the three of them together.

"If you chase two rabbits, both will escape."

I keep repeating the lesson I learned a few years ago when I was faced with coaching both my son's baseball teams, at the same time, in a baseball tournament a few years ago. Both teams made it into the championship game and the games were being played at the same time, in different parts of the complex.

My solution was to run back and forth between the two games, exactly like Greg Brady did in the episode of "The Brady Bunch" when he was dating two girls at the same time.

I got the same result as he did by doing so.

As much as I tried, no matter where I was physically, my mind was at the other game. It was a rookie mistake – one that hindered my being of any help to either team.

"If you chase two rabbits, both will escape."

I pledge to myself that while I am with the boys at the wrestling tournament, my body, my mind and my heart will all be here, too.

One rabbit at a time I can handle.

I focus on my new anxiety. In every wrestling match, somewhere during the match, one wrestler will realize that he will not be able to win, and he will break. It happens in every match, at different points during the match, but it happens. And when it does, it is extremely obvious to the experienced eye.

Am I pushing the boys too much, to soon to compete?

How will they handle the challenge of fight or flight?

Will they be able to harness their built up frustration and anger or will they explode and cause a scene that no one will understand?

I hope I am doing the right thing.

There is a fine line between tough and crazy, and I know I am flirting with it.

Over the course of the next six hours, both Maverick and Travis show signs of really developing as wrestlers. Their stance, their offense, their defense and their desire are all at a noticeably higher level.

I am amazed they are able to stay strong and perform.

Maverick won three of his four matches.

His only loss came at the hands of a wrestler from upstate.

In that match, a call did not go Mavericks way, and instead of getting two points for a takedown, the teenage referee decided to give Maverick's opponent the takedown after a scramble and two very quick back points. Maverick handled it very well, he fought to the end and he very impressively kept his cool.

He has come a long way. Six months ago he would have had a much different mental showing when the call did not go his way.

Travis's day was a little bizarre, and quite honestly, a very cruel test.

Travis also technically won three of his four matches. In the match Travis "lost", he was totally dominating the match. The score was 14-0 in the second period. (Once a wrestler goes up by 15 points they stop the match and award the wrestler with a win by technical fall). Travis needed to score one more point to get the tech.

As they were wrestling, the two wrestlers went out of bounds.

And then a scene right out of the "Karate Kid" breaks out, the one where the evil coach gives the command to "Sweep the Leg."

As the two wrestlers were walking back to the center of the circle to finish the match, the coach gets the attention of his wrestler and gives him a command. The coach takes his forefinger and inserts it into his mouth and pulls on his own cheek. The communication was blatant and obvious.

Up 14-0, Travis is on the top position to restart the match. The whistle blows. Travis's opponent immediately reaches back, inserts his fingers into Travis's mouth and wrenches his neck around. Travis and everyone mat-side are pleading to the teenage referee that the kid has his hands in Travis's mouth. Travis is actually bleeding from the mouth. The referee ignores the pleas as Travis is yanked to his back, choked and quick pinned.

Now the evil Sensei coach rushes the mat, picks up his wrestler in jubilation, all within Travis's punching distance.

"Don't do it Trav, don't do it Trav!" I say helplessly to myself.

After Travis provides proof of the fishhook by showing the ref his scratched, bloody mouth, the referee adds fuel to the fire by making Travis come back into the circle to shake hands the right way. Thus giving Travis another opportunity to explode.

He doesn't.

Although he was fish hooked, he didn't take the bait.

During the three-hour trip back home, I realize that my mind has been concentrating on something other than life or death.

Mission accomplished.

Time to get back to Jess.