Kissed All the Boys | Frerard + COMPLETE ! |

➵ FIFTY SIX

sam

"Have you ever wondered what the future's gonna be like?" Frank asked abruptly, still gazing at the unknown fate above.

"Um, yeah? Doesn't everybody?"

Frank shifted uncomfortably on the rock, suddenly antsy and anxious. After realizing that Gerard had just taken a major step in his life, he started to wonder when he would make his, whatever it may be.

"Well, yeah. But like, realistically. Aren't you...scared?" Frank was now sitting up with Gerard, his head resting on Gee's shoulder.

Gerard wrapped his arm around him, having a deep understanding of what Frank was feeling. He used to stress over the future a lot, distrusting the uncertainty of endings. It wasn't until he met Frank that the idea of quandary stopped bothering him. He wanted Frank to know that it's okay to be afraid of something you can't control, but that he shouldn't be afraid of things that can be.

"No. Are you?"

Hesitant silence.

"A little. We're practically adults, Gee. And adults have responsibilities and reputations and roles. What if...what if our lives go to shit before we can even get to do anything? Don't you wanna do something amazing with your life? Something that matters?"

"Frank, what's wrong? Why're you thinking about all of this right now?

He sighed, closing his eyes and touching his lips to the soft fabric of Gerard's hoodie. "I just...I don't know. This is the peak of our years. Things are changing. You're finding yourself and I'm – I'm doing  nothing. Your life is getting better and mine is just stuck being awful."

Gerard shook his head and took his arm off of Frank, taking his biceps and pulling him vertically to look at him, their eyes inches from each other's. "Do you really think your life is awful?"

"Well, wait, Gerard, I don't mean – "

"Get up," he commanded, standing with him. "Look."

"Okay...What am I looking at?"

"Your life. Your life is here in Mackenzie, Oregon. It's at the apartment. It's at school. It's with me. It used to be in New Jersey. With your parents who didn't love each other anymore. And you learn mom who didn't know how to Mom. It has gotten better. You can't compare yourself to anyone, Frank. That's not how it works. You have to compare yourself to you...Now, look at me."

Frank turned from the forest to Gerard, a sheer glister in his eyes. Gerard took his face in his hands and whispered, his lips brushing Frank's nose as he spoke.

"Don't be scared. Trust me. You have to live in the now or the future will be you wishing you would have. I've learned this the hard way, Frank. I want you to have everything you could ever want."

"You're here with me, aren't you?"