How Pizza Saved My Love Life

1."Netflix and chill"

It was another Friday afternoon and, of course, I had no plans as per usual. Right when the bell rang, dismissing us from class, hollers of loud ass jocks and the laughter of narcissistic, life size Barbies fills the halls. Even nerds have their own squad. Everyone has a way of fitting in, but me. I'm the girl who eats lunch alone with her headphones in, and honestly I don't have a problem with that. I'm not some crybaby that complains about how I can't fit in. I honestly can't be bothered with socializing with a bunch of superficial, loud, annoying, and backstabbing teenage dirtbags.

My view on high school is quite simple. It is a place for learning and a place for stalking fuckboys whom I think are hot but don't act upon it because, well, I'm not stupid.

I have one friend. His name is Joe and he is probably the only person I tolerate in school. We met in freshman year and he turned out to be an actual decent person. Now I'm not some pessimistic ass bitch that hates everyone for no reason. I hate everyone because, simply, everyone is not likable. They are either A) arrogant as fuck B) bitchy as hell C) superficial motherfuckers. I refuse to oblige myself to intermingle with that sort of species.

I wait until everyone in the classroom is out until I get out too. I'm pretty small so I wouldn't want to put myself in a situation of squeezing my tiny body between a bunch of 6'4's.

"Aubrey!" Joe calls my name from the door. I am still collecting my books so I rush myself doing so and walk to him.

"Hey Joe. Haven't seen you all day," I adjust my bag strap on my shoulder.

"I've been looking for you." He gives me a confused look and I the same. "Whatever, anyways. What are you doing tonight?"

"Netflix and chill with pizza," I make some kind of sexual groan and Joe shakes his head laughing.

"Only you would have sex with pizza," he ruffles my hair and I instantly reach out to fix it.

"Okay first of all, don't touch my hair," I give him a threatening glare. "Second of all, I simply used a phrase that our society misinterprets as a sexual innuendo. I meant Netflix. and. Chill. Clearly I didn't state I will be having any kind of sexual intercourse in my statement. Just that I will watch Netflix. And. Relax. And eat pizza."

"Damn Daniel it was a joke geez why so philosophical?" He furrows his brows and mumbles the words.

"Did you just use the word 'philosophical' in a sentence?" I giggle.

"Did you just use the term 'sexual intercourse' in a speech?" He crosses his arms, smirking.

"Touché mister," I raise up my hands in surrender.

"Back to the topic. When do you ever not Netflix and chill on your own?" He asks.

"Are you implying you want to Netflix and chill with me?" I smirk.

"Aubrey, you know what I mean. Fucking get out of the house and go to a party or something," Joe nudges my arm and I push him harder than necessary in return. "Ow!"

"You mean go dance with sweaty, horny, and drunk teenagers in a house of perimeter that does not exceed the perimeter of a cat's litter box? No thanks, I'll pass," I mentally give myself a pat on the back for not stuttering while saying that.

Go Aubrey!

"Fine then. Not a party. Like at least eat at a diner with a nice squad or something."

"I don't have a squad. And Joe would you stop worrying about my social life and start focusing on yours. There are rumors that Susan Hale has her eye on you so I think you should worry about that, bae," I wink at him.

"Oh hell no I hate that bitch," he rolls his eyes and I laugh at his agony. It's honestly so entertaining because he used to like her and they dated for like a week and then she bailed on the relationship. Now I'm not saying it's entertaining that she hurt him I'm saying it's entertaining because he hadn't shut up about how bitchy she is and how much he could merely kill her with a tree branch ever since it happened.

"Why?! She is a doll!" I say in a high pitched voice.

"Well someone better hide her before I rip her head off like a fucking barbie," he says with a grossed out expression on his face.

"You should be nicer to people, Joe! Is that how Mama Aubrey brought you up?" I squeeze his cheeks.

"Yes."

"Okay, true. So what are you gonna do about it?" I ask him and give him my textbooks to carry for me. I really should be less rude towards my only friend.

Oh well he doesn't mind

"Nothing. And if she tried anything I'm probably gonna snatch her weave," he says, surprisingly, not complaining about the books I gave him.

"That's such a girly thing to say," I laugh hysterically at his phrase.

"Maybe I should spend less time with you then," he palms my face and, without thinking, I bite his finger to get his hand off.

"You cannibal!" He stares at the mark my teeth left on his finger.

"Don't touch my face ever again," I say cockily. "You're gonna give me a ride right?"

"Sure. You bite my finger off, make me carry your textbooks, and insult me and I give you a ride. Such a healthy friendship we have." His tone is dripping with sarcasm and I laugh.

"Couldn't agree more. Come on now I wanna get home and cuddle my pillow," I grab his wrist and drag him to his car in the parking lot.

"Dear god help this child," he says before starting the engine.

********

Okay so this is the first chapter of the new book. I've written ten chapters so I wouldn't have trouble updating regularly. I wanted to finish the entire book first but I thought ten chapters were enough and then I'll continue the rest after I publish the book lol.

Tell me what you think please and vote if you liked the chapter bc I'm like super excited for this book it's different than what I would usually write.

Ok enough of that. Love y'all bye xxx