How to Be Cliche (A Novel)

(16) Smile, Bishes

Remember to VOMMENT! Helps me in the Watty Awards, motivates me to write, and makes me SMILE. :DDD

Also, Valentine is a character from my book, Bleeding Royalty! ;)

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While Guide Dog was stunned by my whistle, I brought my foot up to round kick him in the face. Unfortunately, Hunter recovered a lot quicker than I thought he would and caught my foot easily in his big paw-like hand and held it tightly.

            "I'm onto you," I said angrily, balancing on my one foot. "Not literally, as in sex. Although, if you asked nicely and got me those chocolates with the cherries in the middle... Never mind. Do you really think that buying me that outfit would change my view on you? What game are you trying to play here?"

            "I don't play games often." Hunter flashed me a wide, cocky smile as he lifted my foot higher in the air. "But when I do, I win. Stay competitive, my friends."

            "Ow! Ow! Dude, you're going to do some permanent damage down there! And isn't that a commercial or something? Plagiarism! Plagarism! OW! My deltoid!"

            "Your deltoid? That's on your shoulder."

            "I know, you red-rover-red-rover sac of leech! I'm a freaking black belt, I know my muscles! I'm not this flexible anymore! I haven't done hot yoga in a while! I haven't even stretched! Not cool, man! Not cool!"

            "Humans are pathetic." Hunter yanked me towards him and threw me like a Frisbee into a shelve of composition journals and abandoned bottles of glass cleaner and pencils. "What'll it be, sweetheart? Eat you alive from the head down, or the feet up? I'll make it quick"

            "Buy me a drink first," I spat out sarcastically, gripping my throbbing head and standing up wobbly. "What's your deal? What do I have to do to prove that I'm not a hunter?"

            "You've already proved me that you're a hunter. That bird back in the classroom was supposed to kill you," Hunter said, starting towards me again, "and you didn't even get scratched."

            "I have fast reflexes!" I defended.

            Hunter felt the shelf behind me and picked up a few composition journals, then slammed them into my face. Hard. It took me a while to process what had just happened. "Um... OW!!??" I roared, touching my throbbing cheek.

            "Fast reflexes, my ass," Hunter said."Feeling supernatural, now? That should have killed you."

            "Physical abuse, much?! That's not even hot, Hunter! That was so uncalled for!"

            Hunter shrugged. "I'm turned on so that's all that matters."

            I scoffed. Arrogant, thy name is Hunter! "You knew that wasn't going to kill me, didn't you?" I asked, still touching my throbbing cheek.

            Hunter dramatically took off his sunglasses, his glossy eyes staring right at me. He then started to wipe at a smudge on his sunglasses and put them back on. Odd because he's blind...

            I put my hands on my hips, tapping my foot. "Well...?"

            "No, I didn't know if it would kill you or not," he said, flashing me another toxic smile. "I was actually hoping it would so I wouldn't have to hear your annoying voice, to be honest."