The Temptations of Chemistry

Chapter Seventeen - Visiting The Devil

Chapter Seventeen - Visiting The Devil

My mom.

She was back, and wanted to see me and Matty, which meant that nothing good could come from this. I know going to see her is a bad idea, but I guess Matty is not going to budge. He's made up his mind.

I wasn't worried for myself, I could handle living the life of my mother but I knew that my brother couldn't, he just wasn't cut out for it. That being said, I wasn't worried for myself, I was worried for him. Another big part of it was the fact that he was going to see what she is really like and he's going to know how awful my life has been these past three years. 

In less than an hour, I would be out of this damn school desk and on my way to visit my worst nightmare. 

My brain pounded as I thought of so many complications to this. I mean, would Kyle be with her? Would she be surrounded by all her men or even worse, would Richard be there waiting for me?

My nervous foot tapped repeatedly on the floor beneath my desk. I could feel every nerve in my body twitching, I don't even know because they feeling was one of the hardest to explain. It was like my stomach had dropped to the ground, and stayed right there next to my feet. 

Then, as the worry started make me sweat in fear and unreadiness there was one thing that had managed to somewhat calm me down like a wave of relief. That thing being, the hint of concern in Carson's eyes every time he looked at me.

One after the other, another wave of positive energy washed over me when I seen the new Biology assignment I had worked on land on my desk. This time, instead of an F for failure, there was a green circled A at the top. It sat so pretty on the paper that it made my insides dance. There was a smile that actually crept onto my face without me even realizing. It was the first time I had a single happy thought since last night when I returned home to Matty all furious over out mother. 

When I saw the capitalized letter that stood for accomplishment over my paper, the first thought that came to my head was 'I can't wait to show Carson'.

Immediately, I kicked myself mentally because I had to stop depending on him. I had to stop leaning on him and using his face to make me feel comfort. I was going to be gone when the time came, which could be sooner than expected, and I was probably never going to see him again. As much as it killed me to admit it, it was true.

There was something that I knew was so wrong, yet felt so right about my friendship with Carson. It was another one of those hard-to-explain situations. The way that I use Carson's support had to stop, it was unhealthy for me.

The minute that loud, ear piercing bell rang I shot up out of my seat. My feet were walking almost faster than I could process but I knew I just had to get out of there. I stomped the whole way out of the school and I finally ended up in the parking lot.

I glanced around and found Carson in his usual spot. He was standing in front of his truck, leaning against it waiting for me. After sucking back a breath, I decided that I was going to walk directly pass him. I could walk home, it wasn't far.

It wasn't like there wasn't determination in me, because god was there ever, but the closer I got to where he was parked the more I wanted to run to him. I wanted to skip over to him and throw my arms around him and sing out that I had actually gotten an A in Biology. While my mind was yelling at me to keep going, my feet had listened to my heart and the next thing I knew I was standing directly in front of him and gazing into his green eyes with the widest smile stretched on my face.

"What?" He asked curiously, quirking the corner of his mouth.

"I got an A!" I yelled excitedly and bit my lip. I was still smiling because I could help myself. I reached my hand out to pass it to Carson but he clearly already believed me.