The Yogscast Guarantee

Chapter 8 Willow Trees and Tainted Sparks

I woke up to the beeping of the alarm, I rolled over and put my arm over Smith, my chest against his back. ‘Morning.’ He mumbled in his deep morning voice which still made my hairs stand on end, ‘it’s too early.’ I said nuzzling his shoulder, ‘well you shouldn't of stayed up so late.’ Smith mumbled, ‘It’s not all my fault is it though Mr. Smith.’ I said holding the duvet to cover myself the cold clawing  at my warm bare back. Smith rolled over to face me, ‘you want a cup of tea?’ I asked him and he smiled brushing my hair behind my ear. I sat on the edge of the bed and picked up a pair of pants and one of Smith’s button up shirts before getting changed and going down stairs.

I walked into the kitchen and Kim was stood there in a similar attire. ‘Good morning.’ I said walking in, Kim looked over her shoulder at me and bit her bottom lip. ‘Morning.’ She said before sitting at the table with her mug being very shy. ‘Good night?’ I asked her and she smirked, ‘might have been.’ She said and we both giggled, ‘what’s so funny?’ Ross said standing in the doorway, wearing his joggers and his hair slightly messier than normal. ‘Nothing.’ I said smiling at him before going back upstairs with two steaming mugs in hand.

I walked in and Smith was sat up in bed waiting for my return, I handed him his mug and I placed mine on the bedside table and got back into bed next to him. ‘What time do you want to go and see your mum?’ He asked, I sighed, ‘let’s go in a bit, then we can pop to the office as well.’ I told him and he nodded. I got changed into my jeans and new Sips t-shirt and we both headed for the rehab centre.

I never enjoyed the journey over, it took a while and I would have butterflies fluttering around in My tummy, Smith placed his hand on my thigh as we drove, almost like he knew.

We parked up and headed to the reception, my hand was sweating and I felt wobbly. ‘You alright?’ Smith asked and I nodded worried I wouldn't be able to formulate words. After we were all signed in we waited for my mum to appear. The man from the front desk came up to us, I was worried she wouldn't want to see me again. ‘She is out in the garden at the moment, I can take you there now if you're ready.’ He said, Smith stood up and I did also and we followed the nice man through the building and out into a large sunny open area with flower beds and a small stream running through the middle. ‘Kelly will probably be up there in a gazebo.’ He said pointing to a white gazebo under a willow tree the far end of the stream. ‘Ok thanks.’ Smith said shaking the guys hand.

We walked over to the gazebo and mum was sat there playing cards on her own. ‘Hey mum.’ I said as Smith and I walked in she didn't look up at first but as Smith started pulling over the chairs so we could sit down she stopped what she was doing. ‘It’s really nice here isn't it.’ I said sitting down, ‘what do you want Abbey?’ She said folding her arms, ‘nothing we just came to visit.’ Smith told her, ‘how you doing mum?’ I asked her and she leant forward her forearms on the table. ‘I am good, you know. I think I am ready to come home.’ she said a tainted spark I her eye. ‘When are you allowed to go home?’ I asked her and she shrugged her shoulders, ‘they don't tell me shit. But when I am out everything will be back to normal.’ she said. I looked at Smith and bit my bottom lip, ‘i don't think it’s that simple mum. The cafe closed down and you can't go back home to that hole it was horrible.’ I told her and she flopped back in her chair. ‘Fuck. So what am I going to do?’ she said getting frustrated, ‘i am going to have to come and live with you lot aren't i.’ she said and I am pretty sure mine and Smith’s faces were a picture. ‘Well, i….errr.’ I couldn't say anything, ‘what you don't love your mother?’ she said leaning back in. Smith intervened, ‘i think we should explore different options first there are six of us living there as it is, you really don't want to live there.’ He tried to put her off. ‘What other options?’ she asked him, ‘well we could get you a littlelace of your own.’ he suggested, I looked at Smith, ‘ok, sounds good, you go talk to the people in the house and see when I can leave.’ she said and smiled at us both, but it wasn't a loving smile. It, like her spark was tainted.

Smith and I walked back towards the building and I put my hands in my pockets catching the back of my hand on my visitor's badge, ‘shit.’ I hissed rubbing my hand, ‘you alright?’ he asked and I sighed, ‘she isn't ready to leave, she just isn't, we all know that, even her.’ I said shaking my hand before putting it back into my pocket more cautiously. ‘She seemed a lot better than the last time, when you and Ross came she didn't even want to see you. Today, you had a whole conversation with her.’ Smith tried to remain positive. That seemed to be the norm nowadays. Smith would battle to keep me in the positive, help me find the good in every situation. He was losing. ‘She cant come and live with us when she gets out.’ I told him, ‘ I know I was trying to give her something to look forward to, it helps.’ he said holding the door open for me. ‘You guys alright?’ a guy said walking up to us, ‘yeah we are just heading out.’ Smith said, ‘oh you're with Kelly? Kelly Carter?’ he asked ‘yeah we are, who are you?’ I asked him wondering how he knew her. ‘Oh I have worked with her through some psychological troubles. Kevin.’ he held his hand out and Smith shook it. ‘How is she doing then doc?’ Smith asked him, ‘well she certainly has a character, she talks about Abbey a lot, your Abbey right you match the description to a point.’ I nodded, ‘yes she talks a lot of you but dared not show anyone. She closes herself off, she didn't even say anything the first two sessions. She doesn't like to appear weak in front of people she cares about.’ he looked at me, ‘that’s why it seems like she is hiding something sometimes, she’s afraid of appearing weak.’ he told me, ‘why is she afraid of appearing weak?’ I asked him and he folded his arms, ‘she hasn't told me, I don't know if she will.’ he said, ‘thank you Kevin, I feel like we will see eachother again soon.’ Smith shook his hand and we continued out of the building signing out.