Don't Say That (Completed)

Chapter #1

(Edited)

The view of the top of the building was beautiful. Well if you get rid of the crashed cars, crowded bridge, and dead people walking. Yup, I said dead people. I would have called myself crazy to even think that a month ago. But things change. My life changed. My friends changed, family. Lets not talk about that right now. I don't think I can take thinking that way right now. The past couple of weeks has got me to learn that it is hard to get people to trust you, and it's hard to put your trust in someone else. Lucky me I did find someone. Someone that I would put my life at risk for, And I think he would do the same for me. I hope so, that is. My life use to be full of violin practices, high school tests, and home drama. Now I can't even imagine going back to that. It was only a month ago but it feels like forever, But the truth is I don't miss it. I never got to make my own choices, that was my parents doing. I wanted to learn art and writing. They wanted business and music. Look how much I need that now, I could have been doing woodshop learning stuff that could have helped me right now. No, but I do know how to play the nutcracker easy, medium, and hard. I should probably start from the beginning of this disaster that is now my home. Where should I start. Let's start with the last normal day I had.

I was in school, in Mr.Hersom class to be exact. As always I sat in the back corner, I'm known as a freak to people in this school. Getting high grades and wearing clothes that show my belly sometimes in a small town full of rich jerks, makes people think. Lets just say they might think I sleep with my teachers to get the grades I have. Isn't that amazing to be told that you're stupid and not good enough to get those grades, so you sleep with people. But to be totally honest I don't care one bit. I have my best friend, who is my cousin, and my best guy friend to get through this crap till graduation.

"Well Well, what is the slut doing today? Is it Mr.Edwards or Mr.Smith? Or is it both?", Said the cake face with blonde hair and her plastic friends. Her name is Camila, but I like cake face better, mostly when it's true.

I ignored her and kept on doodling in my notebook. After a few minutes of her trying to get a reaction out of me, her and her plastics left. The bell rang telling me that it was time to go home. Thank God. Walking up to my locker I see a note on the door with my name on it. I usually just rip them up and through them in the trash, but today was different. I actually opened it and read the words inside. Most of it was stupid stuff like who is your next booty call, and stuff like that. But the last parts hurt. It was about how I sleep with my dad so I can get the stuff I want. To most people that would be water off a duck's back compared to the teacher thing, but that hurt. My dad died of lung cancer a year ago. No, this is not a 'I miss him' or 'Life sucks without my dad'. It's a 'Life is way better without him'. That might sound harsh and it does but it's true.

My dad was abusive to me and my mom, just in different ways. To my mom he would physically hurt her, and that almost killed her. With me he was sexually abusive, as in I did sleep with him. One night my dad was in the kitchen with my mom. He told her we needed some stuff from the store, which is a good 30 minutes away from where we lived at the time. I offered to go with her, but he said no. A little while later he gave me a bowl with vanilla ice cream in it. I thought he was just being nice, or it went bad and he didn't want it to go to waist. After eating it I felt really tired, so I went up to my room. The next thing I know it's morning and my area down there is in total pain. To top it all off my pants were on the staircase and my underwear was on my lamp. And to top that all off, my dad was next to me drunk with his pants down to his ankles. He did the same thing every night for 2 months, even when I was on my period. He was too drunk to notice anyways. Just those times he didn't drug me, he more like threatened me into doing it. It was that or my mom would get hurt. What would you pick?

Well anyways, after I stared at the piece of paper I crippled it up and though it in my locker. I went straight to my car when I exited the building. It was a rust bucket of a car but it was better than walking everywhere. I only have it because I worked this summer at a local repair shop. They saw how my life was back home and how I was treated in school from there kids, so they gave it to me. All I needed to do was work every Friday for 3 hours for a year and it's all mine.