28 Days

Day 20

Short update. Part two will be posted... soon? Hahaha. Shet. Finals na kasi next week!!!

WAAAAH DAY 20 NA MALAPIT NG MATAPOS. NAIIYAK AKO. LESS THAN 10 UPDATES AND WE'RE DONE. HUHUHU.

Again, thank you sa lahat ng nagbabasa nito. Thanks to you!

Oy tweet nyo lang ako ha. @kyemeeeh #28DaysWP Hi sa mga chumichika sakin sa twitter, sobrang cute nyo!

Day 20's up.

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Day 20

"Here, drink some water first."

I accepted the water and drank it straight. I still can't process what happened this day. What I just wanted to happen today was to have a talk with Alden, maybe sort some things out and finally move on. But things turned out worst and now I am torn with all the revelations with Kim.

I know I've done unspeakable things that until now I am trying to fix. I've walked away from people who loved me. I’ve caused pain, I’ve felt the same. I wanted to correct all my mistakes by making amends to the people I've hurt but I am no saint, and I don’t strive to be. I can't easily give what Kim is asking for me. I can't let RJ go just like that. But my head is telling me the other way. My heart and my brain is battling again and I don't know what to do.

"I'll go home now." I stood up and gathered my things when I felt Jake's hand stopped me.

"Stay. Umaga na at baka mapano ka pa sa daan. I'll drive you tomorrow morning."

I had no energy to reject Jake and just stayed in his condo. He led me on his room and went to his closet to look for some clothes.

"Here. Take a shower before you sleep." He said before he handed a his shirt and a pair of shorts.

I went to the bathroom and discarded all my clothes. I let the shower head spray me. I imagined my tension and worry washing away, but it didn't help even a bit. I stood up there crying. God knows how I wanted to make up to RJ but how could I do that with all the things Kim have said to me earlier? She needs RJ. But I need him too. Is this a battle of who needs who the most? Hindi ba pwedeng ako naman kasi ang tagal ko ng nagtiis, ang tagal ko ng naghintay, at ang tagal ko ng nagparaya?

I didn't know how long I was under the shower but I can already feel my fingers wrinkled and trembled. It was  cold but it wasn't on the list of the things running on my head right now.

"Maine? Maine? Are you okay? If you don't open the door in a minute I'll come in!"

I heard Jake's voice outside but I didn't move. I hugged my knees and buried my head into them as I continued the water flow into my body. A minute later, I heard the door forcely opened and the water stopped. Jake wrapped a towel over my body and I can't help but to hide my face in embarassment.

"Don't look at me.. I'm a wreck."

"Then let me fix you. Just let me, Maine."

I buried my face in his chest and continued crying. "You can't fix me, Jake. No matter what I do, no matter how I tried.. No matter where I go.. I'd still and always will come back running to him. He is the one causing my pain, yet he's the only one who can heal me too. I'm sorry Jake. Even if I could choose whom this heart is going to beat for.. I would still choose him."

I felt his hug tightened as I felt his arm slowly patted my back. "I know. And if only I can punch that guy so he would be knocked on to his senses, I would. And if only I had met you first, you won't be crying here in my shoulders."

"Even I had met you first, I'd still choose him. That's how stupid this heart is."

"Well that hurts. But Maine, can you see yourself now? He is slowly destroying you. And you can't just let me watch how he breaks you into pieces. It breaks me too."

"Remember when you told me I was worth the wait? For me, he is worth the wait too. And.. he is worth the pain. He had suffered a long way too before and he is right. This time, I should fight for us."

"...this time, I would fight for us just the way he fought for me."