2:56 :: h.s

trente cinq

00:04

I walk in the front door and head straight to my room.
It's been a long day and I can't wait to go to bed.

Ashlyn ordered pizza for everyone and we ended up staying later than planned.

I sigh as I take off my shoes and change my clothes.
I pull a pair of sweatpants over my legs and fall onto my bed.

I can't even think before sleep overcomes me.

::

2:12

There is a tapping at my window.
I roll over to look at the clock.

Who the hell is knocking at my window at two o'clock in the morning?

That's a stupid question, I know who.

I rub my eyes and open the window.
I fall back onto my bed while Rae climbs inside.
She drops next to me, stands up, closes the window, and sits back down.
I roll over to face her.

She gives me a smile that doesn't reach her eyes, "hi."

I swallow, "hi."

"How've you been?"

"Fine."

"Good."

"Where have you been?"

She shrugs, "thinking."

"About?"

"You."

"Me too."

"I love you."

I stare at my ceiling, "you can't just run away when things get tough, you know."

She picks at her jeans, "I know."

I look at her, "then why do you keep doing it?"

"I don't know," she shrugs.

I groan in annoyance. "Stop doing it."

"I'm sorry."

Her voice is so small but the crack it puts in my chest is so large.

I sigh, "I'm sorry."

She shakes her head, "no, this is my fault. I've always left when things got hard and it's one of my many flaws."

I reach up to her and move a piece of hair from her face. "Just talk to me next time, okay?"

She grabs my hand as it falls and holds it gently between her hands.
She nods.

I sigh and grab ahold of both of her hands.
Rae looks at me and I pull her hands down.

"Stay with me tonight?" I ask.

Her eyes avert behind me quickly, then she nods.
I climb off my bed and find a sweatshirt.
Rae moves all of my blankets to the empty side of the bed.
I lay back down and cover myself with the sheets.
She lies on her side and looks at me.

I smile and she does too.
Rae reaches out and laces her fingers through my hair.
My eyes flutter closed and my breathing slows.
She continues to play with my hair and I reach over to her.
My arm hooks around her waist and pulls her closer to me.
She kisses my forehead.
When I open my eyes, her eyes are closed and her hand moves lazily through my hair.

"I love you," I whisper.

She smiles, "I love you."

I lean up to kiss her and her smile widens.

Her lips send liquid nitrogen throughout my body.
My hand moves to her cheek.
She slowly sits up and I follow her.
Her arms fall around my neck and her legs straddle my thighs.
I bring my hands to her waist and hold her closer to me.

This is all so surreal.
Life and death mixing in such an incomprehensible way.
Cold sending flames throughout a being by one simple touch.
Ice working with fire like an angel working with a devil.

Rae's soft lips move quickly against mine.
Then her body goes stiff.
I pull away from her and her eyes are wide.
Her mouth is open wide and a gasp escapes her lips.

Wait, what?

Her eyes twitch and they look as if they're begging me to help her.
The top of her neck begins to concave.
What looks like a rope burn forms below her jaw.

Then she screams.

It's a blood curdling scream.
Her hands fly to her neck and try to pull at whatever seems to be there.
I jump back from underneath her and lean against my hands.
She continues to gasp for air between screams.
The burn on her neck becomes darker.

Suddenly, everything stops.
Not a sound comes from her.
Rae's body goes limp.
Her eyes close slowly.
The last breath of air she swallowed escapes her lips.

I stare.
I don't know what else to do.
It's no use to poke her.

So many questions are running through my mind.

What just happened?
Did she move on?
Is this normal?
What was it?
Did she feel it?

Rae opens her eyes and sits up.
She rubs her face then looks at me.

My jaw is practically on the floor and my eyes are wide.
Rae averts her attention from me to her hands.

Her words come out shaky and scared, "let me explain."