Not What I Had in Mind (Chat Noir x reader)

@Life: Why Must You Make Him Murderous

*slight trigger warning*

//also you may have noticed but I don't update this at the same time as I do with my Quotev one so that's why this Valentine's day chapter in updated at the end of March

         I left my Art class in a fairly good mood. My teacher complemented my quote on quote "art work" which was just a bunch of scribbles since no inspiration was coming to me. Modern art, even though I'm pretty sure I just drew a penis. Then again if I look at it another way it looks like an elephant. I went to my locker and put away my art book. I grabbed my phone, oh jeez the squad is spamming my phone again. I sighed and opened the chat wonder what kind of hell they're raising this time.
'RILEY X GRAYSON' Hannah typed. '#MAKEITCANON'
'NONONONONON'
'YESYEYSYEYSYES'
'I'M 2 HOT 3 HIM'
'FIRST OF ALL HOE
I'M 3 HOT 5 YOU'
Not too bad of a hell. This is my chance. I'm gonna do it and everyone it going to hate me.
'Rileson ftw
wait if you two had kids
you'd probably have some Rilesons'
'GTFO'
'I STG'
'LEAVE MY HOUSE'
Riley kicked me off of the group chat. Well fine, I see how it is. The City of Baguettes has one less faguette now, assholes. I went to my text messenger. I opened up the chat with Adrien (I actually added a heart to his name but shhh we don't talk about that) and texted him.
'Hey Adrien, I'm gonna head back to my house and get ready for our date so swing by my place when you're ready (~˘▾˘)~'
Oh god the emoji I've gotten into that stage of texting someone you like. Hopefully I don't start drowning him with them. I shoved my glitchy phone and locked up my locker. Now to make the treacherous journey back to my home so I'm not wearing a hoodie that's cover in the dust of Cheetos.
I left the school and found Chloe at the corner holding up a poster. There was a bunch of girls who looked distraught. Oh boy, I wonder what she did this time. I had no choice but to go in that direction since my home was in that direction. I studied the poster as I walked by. Okay so that's an add for cologne and Adrien's face takes up half the poster. Oh jeez, he's a person too and the fact that we know him in real life is even weirder. Like if you're best friend was Benedryll Cucumberpatch you would keep his face right above your bed like no honey, you'll just creep him out especially if kiss marks are noticeable.
All the way home I saw people holding hands and many kisses. Teddy bears and balloons were everywhere too. Adrien and I might be like that on our date. He still needs to explain how he knew I was looking for Riley and Fern and why he kissed me. Well the kissing me part makes it obvious he likes me. I saw a black cat run across the street, it barely missed the car. Huh, black cat, chat noir, Chat Noir. Thinking about it for once with out anything getting in the way, he and Adrien were quite similar. Their voices were so similar, I even thought Noir was Adrien.
If Adrien parted his hair like Noir's he'd probably look like him. They even act similar. I remember Noir dropping his cocky smile to surprise when pigeons attacked. When Adrien said that Noir would make things up for me he practically predicted it. He even called my unhealthy infatuation "flattering". Man does he have some explaining to do.
When I got home I went straight up the stairs and to my room and picked out a decent outfit which wouldn't matter at all since I put on a different hoodie after feeling a breeze from my open window. I need to adapt to the cold. I went downstairs, my hands a little sweaty. This was my first date ever and I never expected it to be with the first person I met here. I got out my phone, should I text him? Eh, screw it.
'Where are we going?'
He took a while to reply, 'Just to a little cafe :) , that's okay with you right?'
'Yeah sounds good ( ＾◡＾)っ✂╰⋃╯
WRONG EMOJI **(•⌣•) OMFG I'M DEAD '
'Lol, I'll be at your place in a bit ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ'
'See you soon!'
I switched to my other chat. Oh wait, they kicked me out. How lame. I texted Fern to add me back and she did.
'I'M GOING ON A DATE WITH ADRIEN'
'Finally, a ship that will sail' Hannah texted.
'Does this mean I have a new father?' texted Fern.
'//DOUBT'
'Forever in a home with a single parent who sleeps away their problems. //cry'
'I never slept my bad grades away, trying to get into them awesome colleges bro. Make myself look good on applications.'
'ENOUGH GIVE DEETS ABOUT DATE' texted Riley
'o k damn he's taking me to a cafe'
'then what?'
'park? idk'
'as long as you two don't do anything stupid' texted Grayson.
'I'm guessing you mean sex?'
'No I mean jumping into a pond and quaking at little old ladies as to demand bread from them OF COURSE I MEAN SEX WHAT ELSE WOULD TWO TEENS DO WHEN ONE OF THEM HAS THEIR PARENTS GONE FROM HOME FOR MOST OF THE DAY'
'I'd say play Yahtzee but according to Mean Girls make out and eventually bang'
'Exactly, now stop making everything about Mean Girls'
'ON WEDNESDAY WE WEAR PINK' Hannah texted.
Hannah was deleted from the chat. Rest in spaghetti, never forgetti. I soon heard my doorbell ring. I went over to the front door and opened in up. There stood a glorious ray of sunshine my date, holding a giant box of chocolates, a bouquet of roses, and a giant teddy bear. Damn boy, I know you're rich but damn you don't have to spend all this on me. Just kidding, I love getting spoiled.
"Happy Valentine's Day!" Adrien said. He started blushing, "Well um, these are for you." He thrusted the stuff into my arms. I almost dropped the teddy bear onto the tile floor. I was basically trying to play Tetris with the three things.
"Thanks Adrien, you really didn't have to get me these though." moved backwards into my house and did a tiny motion as to say 'follow me' with my hand. Adrien followed, hands in his pockets. I placed the gifts onto the couch.
"Sorry, I didn't know if I should I mean, I saw people bring giant teddy bears for their lovers so I just thought.. Sorry this is my first date ever so I just... yeah.." He gave a cute awkward smile. I laughed, messing up the taller boy's blonde hair.
"It's fine, dude. I love getting gifts, you're sweet." This made him blush even redder. "Anyways, let's go!" I hooked my arm with his. We left my home, I of course had to locked it up first, and went on our merry way to the cafe.

"Dude I had no idea you liked Attack on Titan!" I said excitedly before I took a sip from my mocha.
Adrien rubbed the back of his head, "Yeah actually, know one really knows it but I'm a bit of an anime nerd."
"Dude nice! Tell me your favorite animes! Wait first, who's your favorite AoT character?"
"Eren Jaeger actually, he's just so determined. I admire that about him."
"Radical, Armin is my favorite character. He's smart, capable of murder, cute, blonde... Wait shit forget I said that last part!"
Adrien laughed and wiggled his eyebrows a bit, "So you have a thing for blondes?"
"Well I um... er, I just, ya know. Aesthetic."
My phone buzzed, which was odd since I muted the group chat before we entered the cafe. I smiled apologetically to Adrien and took it then he took out his phone too. I got a text. Opening it up, I saw it was a picture of Kim who I laughed at when he fell on his face. He was soaked, had a bag of chips stuck to the side of his face, and looked absolutely devastated.
"Poor guy.." I heard Adrien mumble.
I looked up from my phone, "Did you get the photo of Kim too?"
"Yeah..." he sighed, "this is a new low for Chloe."
"This is a new low? Hell dude, Chloe bullied my friend in front of a group of people which lead her to become a psychopath. Now it's Kim's turn to turn into a psychopath." I sighed.
He rubbed the sides of his temple. Adrien mumbled incoherently as he tucked away his phone. It began to ring, he answered, bringing it up to his ear."Huh?...... I'm in the middle of a date though.... I-.... okay..." He sighed and stood up. "I have to go, my dad wants me at another photo shoot."
I didn't want him to go, I wanted to spend more time with him. "Okay, have fun, Adrien..." He smile as an apology. Adrien got up and kissed my forehead then he left through the entrance.
I sighed, taking a long sip from my mocha. First day memories, yay. Well the date wasn't horrible. We were actually having a really nice time before he had to go. I got up from my seat and left the cafe.

I walked halfway home that is until Noir jumped right in front of me. "Um, hey Noir... what's with the black lipstick?"
"You're always asking questions." Noir chuckled darkly making me take a step back. Noir took a step forward, "It's mine turn to ask a question: do you know what would be the best for you to do now?" I turned on my heel and started running. I'm guessing it's the right answer since my prize is staying alive.
I ran pretty far. People were acting bat shit insane. There was this one man beating up a boquet of flowers, another screaming hysterically at some woman, and a woman screaming about how she should have married a stripper. What the hell was going on? I took a left into an alleyway, ladders of fire escapes were pulled up. Goddamnit. "There you are." I turned around, Chat Noir.
Noir had a sadistic grin on his face with his claws at the ready. I looked around to see if there was anyway to escape, there wasn't. "You don't know how glad I am to finally get rid of you."
"Get rid of me? Just a few weeks ago you were smooching me and then we're good friends and now you're trying to kill me! What the fuck, Noir!?" I threw my mocha at him. He simply dodged it and stepped closer to me. He pinned me onto the wall and grabbed my throat, causing me to choke. I scratched at his hand to try to get him off but to no use.
"I've always wondered what would happened if I used my power on someone." He was taking his time, almost as to let me suffocate. My vision became blurry, I could feel myself start to slip away.
"Cataclysm!" He brought done his claw only for it to be caught by a yo-yo. He got pulled away by the yo-yo's own, a red figure.
I fell to the ground and land on all fours. With my dirtied-hands,I rubbed my throat, breathing heavily. I looked up and saw a black figure fight with the red figure. The red figure turned into Ladybug as my vision regained. Ladybug took Noir's staff with her yo-yo and pinned him against the wall with it.
"I knew you were having issues with Noir but I didn't know he was having issues with you." Ladybug huffed as she struggled to keep Noir pinned.
I got up from the ground and looked at her with confusion. "Ladybug I never told you anything about me having issues with Noir."
"What? You let something slip while your friends were in town!"
"No, I didn't."
Ladybug fumbled with her words, only to have Noir break free of her hold. He tried to get Ladybug but she rammed his staff into his chest.
Ladybug and I took this as a chance to escape. We ran to a fountain which has this week's psycho. He spotted us and shot an arrow at us. Ladybug and I quickly hid behind a tree, the arrow just barely missing my foot. Noir came back and joined with the psycho.
"Okay first, why is Noir trying to kill me, second, how did you that that i had issues with Noir? The only person I told anyone about it was Adrien- a guy from my school, but he had his phone stolen by...." I stared into Ladybug's eyes. The same bright blue eyes. Now I was drawing connections. The reason why they showed up when I was with Nathanael, the same reason why she got to museum so quick, the reason Adrien's phone got stolen. "I know who you are. You read that message I sent him."
Ladybug covered my mouth to keep me from saying anything more, "Don't tell anyone, please." I nodded. She let out a sigh of relief, "Good." She uncovered my mouth, "I'll explain things to you later, but right now, we need to defeat Dark Cupid." She did her Lucky Charm thing and out came a candy apple.
"So you're gonna make their situation sticky?" I asked. I know this wasn't the time to make bad jokes but I needed to.
She quickly studied our enemy duo, "Yes, yes I am." She stepped out from the tree. I stayed behind the tree, there wasn't much for me to do unless be used as a human shield. I waited for her to call out my name in hopes that I would be useful. Still, I can't believe that Marinette is Ladybug. Well the least expected the more likely I guess.
"(Y/n) now!" Ladybug yelled. I ran out from behind the tree. Ladybug was pinned by Noir with his Cataclysm claw about to get her. I didn't really know what to do so I just tackle him off her. Apparently this was according to Ladybug's plan. Noir and I rolled a little bit of distance away, I ended up underneath him. Oh god, this is exactly what Grayson did not want happening today. "Good, now kiss him!" Ladybug yelled. Well I'm not one to go against the plan of a superhero. I grabbed Noir's face and kissed him. He was hesitant at first but then soon kissed back. His lips locked with mine.
Chat pulled away, he was now black lipstick free. Ladybug picked him up and actually threw him at Dark Cupid was was washing his hands at the fountain. "Get the pin, kitty!" she said. Noir got the pin off of D.C and threw it at me, "Happy Valentine's Day!"
I caught the pin. "You shouldn't have! No really I'd much rather have chocolates." I dropped the pin and broke it with my foot. The butterfly came out and Ladybug captured it. She then released it and fixed everything with her Lucky Charm.
"Well anyways, I think I'm gonna go home and enjoy the chocolates I got earlier." I waved to the superheroes but I then whipped out my phone as I walked home.
'Marinette, you better explain things soon.'

//also that AoT thing his based off of his English voice actor being Eren Jaegar's voice actor