Harry POV
"But harry... Your the lucky one. I'm in love with someone too. Someone who doesn't love me back. Someone who loves someone else. Someone who is engaged. I'm in love with Zayn." I dreamed. I don't really know what's going on at the moment. All I know is that I'm asleep. For how long? Maybe just a few hours. But it feels like so much longer. Vague memories of people screaming my name, blinding lights in my eyes I couldn't figure out how to keep open. And that annoying BEEP BEEP BEEP that I couldn't get out of my head. But why? And why was I having such strange dreams. I was in a hospital in one. I'm not even sure why. It was an out of body experience, I saw myself lying on the hospital bed and I saw Liam laying over me, some silent tears dropping from his face. That's when he told me he loved Zayn. Surely, it was just a dream. But I'm not sure if it really was. I mean, he told me in the dream, but looking back on the way he's been acting lately, maybe its true in real life. No, thats crazy talk. Liam and I have shared everything this past year and a half. He would have told me. Or I would have at least recognized the signs. And besides, Liam is straight. He's had girlfriends during the time we were a band. There's no way its true.
So many strange dreams. I had one that was worst of all. Louis and Eleanor were there. We were on a boat going to who knows where. Louis and Eleanor were kissing and being all lovey dovey. There was nobody on the boat but me and them. We were offshore and there was no land in sight. Louis and Eleanor come over to me, laughing, love in their eyes as they looked at each other. Then Louis glanced over at me. His love-filled eyes turned to anger and his face got red. "Stay here, my love. I've got something to take care of." He let go of Eleanor's arm and came towards me, full of rage. "I should have done this along time ago" Was the last thing I heard before being thrown off the boat into the depths of the unknown.
Another. Everyone in the band as well as Perrie and Eleanor were sitting around a campfire. We were laughing and having a good time and it almost felt like old times again. But the topic of conversation somehow changed and everyone but me were huddling close, whispering. I heard it though. They were talking about me. Saying that I annoyed them. Saying I couldn't sing. Saying the band would be better off without me. Saying I was worthless. With every insult, their voices rose and they broke from their cluster, advancing towards me. By the end of the dream they were screaming, hitting me with every last word. Not like I didnt deserve it.
More. I was sitting on my couch and Niall walked through the front door. Following him came the rest of the boys. "We're having a movie day, just us boys." They tod me. Finally, a good dream. All of the sudden, Louis's eyes turned a piercing red and all of the other boys morphed into perfect clones of him "I don't love you, Harry. I never have and I never will. Why can't you get over me, you worthless piece of crap?" They all said in unison. I backed up slowly, trying to get out of the flat. But the walls turned black and there was no escaping. Each breth I took, the walls closed in. There was no escapiong.
How much longer will this go on. "No, Liam. You don't know the story. Hell, Harry doesn't know the story. I love him. So much. I may seem like I'm okay, but I'm beyond broken on the inside." Louis screamed at Liam. I was back in the hospital bed, having the same out of body experience as my first dream. "Ha ha so funny. Stop lying, Louis. If you loved him you wouldn't ha-" "No, Liam. I left him BECAUSE I love him. Vanessa had a meeting with me... she told me I was going to have to pretend that I loved Eleanor. She forbidded me from dating Harry or she would... I don't even know what she would do. But it wouldn't be good and it would affect the whole band. I wasn't given a choice, Liam. So stop. You don't know how much it hurts me to pretend I don't have feelings for Harry. I'm done. I have nothing else to give. I love him, and I can't be with him. But I do love him, so don't even try to say I don't. He's the love of my life. The only person I want for eternity but I am not allowed to have him. You know what, just forget it." And with that, Louis was gone. He left the room. I wanted ever so badly to run after him and kiss him, I finally had a good dream for once. But it was like I was glued into place. I struggled but to no avail. Things started getting fuzzy, the blining lights came back an the BEEP BEEP BEEP became ever so louder.
I awoke with a start, the hospital lights burning my eyes. The machine beside me was beeping, but it was a comforting sound to know that my heart was still beating. But then everything came flooding back. My love for Louis. The beach. Eleanor. The eleven cuts I had cut into my flesh. And I wished more than ever for the BEEP BEEP BEEP to become one long BEEEEEEP. I wish that I wasn't living so I don't have to deal with the fact that I'm unhappy. That Louis doesn't love me and I was worthless, just like they all told me in my dream. I saw Liam staring out the open door with a worried look on his face. He hadn't seem me yet. "H-Hi" I managed to get out and Liam jumped at the sound. "Harry!" Liam screamed and ran to hug me. "I was so worried. Don't ever scare us like that again." He told me. I gave him a weak smile before I closed my eyes again, tired from all the medication I was on. At this moment I was wishig it wasn't Liam here when I woke up. but Louis. At this moment I was wishing it wasn't just a dream when Louis said he still loved me.
A/N: Sooooooooo what do you think?! Harry thinks its just a dream... hmmmm. Are you guys getting into this plot and all or not? Its still developing right now considering its only the 8th chapter. Sorry its so short, but this was a very neccessary chapter for the story. And if you haven't noticed, I've been puttig Larry gifs on the side. I've gotta admit, this chapter's gif is my favorite. So yeah. That's if you're using a computer. Yay. Please leave your feedback in the comments, vote for sure, and follow! :)
~Mary
