Louis POV
Things just aren't alright anymore. Eleanor is doing the best that she can to keep me around, but I kinda just retreat to my own little world. When we aren't doing some promo thing for One Direction, I stay inside and don't want to see anyone. I just can't take it anymore. Eleanor always calls, she worries about me. Sometimes she comes over to make sure I'm alright, and to feed me. Truth is, I haven't been eating a lot lately. I guess I'm just too depressed. I love Harry. I always have and always will. But I've really messed everything up. Even if management let's us be together, he will never take me back. I completely broke him, shattered him into a thousand pieces. Am I proud? Of course not. But unfortunately there's nothing I can do. Lately I've spent my days talking to myself, sitting by myself with nothing to do. I could always go out with the boys, they always invite me when they go out... but I can't face Harry right now. Ever since he heard about this stupid engagement he hasn't been the same. I've noticed fresh scars, but I don't want to ask about them, I know they're there because of me. And I know that I could fix this whole thing by coming clean... but it would breach the contract and I'm not risking the band being forcefully broken up because of that. Of course I could tell him without them knowing, but they'd find out anyway. Vanessa has eyes everywhere, and even if she didn't find out, Harry would just be angry. And that would be evident considering Harry can't hide his feelings all that way.
But I always could tell him...So why don't I?
Maybe it's the selfish part of me, but maybe its for something greater. If Harry found out, word would get out that he knew. This whole "we don't love each other" lie will become fake. Neither of us are great actors, especially not Harry, and there's no way that any of this would work. Everything would come crumbling down and so would our carreers. So that's no longer an option,
I put in my earbuds, after not doing anything for so long I need a way to pass time, and put it on shuffle. When I see the song that comes on, I chickle because it kinda escrobes mky situation perfectly, but that chuckle turns sadder by the second until there's no noise to be heard besides the music playing, silent tears streaming down my face.
I know you're somewhere out there
Somewhere far away
I want you back
I want you back
My neighbors think I'm crazy
But they don't understand
You're all I had
You're all I had
At night when the stars light up my room
I sit by myself talking to the moon.
Trying to get to you
In hopes you're on the other side talking to me too.
Or am I a fool who sits alone talking to the moon?
Ohoooo...
I'm feeling like I'm famous
The talk of the town
They say I've gone mad
Yeah, I've gone mad
But they don't know what I know
Cause when the sun goes down
Someone's talking back
Yeah, they're talking back
Ohhh
At night when the stars light up my room
I sit by myself talking to the moon.
Trying to get to you
In hopes you're on the other side talking to me too.
Or am I a fool who sits alone talking to the moon?
Ahh... Ahh... Ahh...
Do you ever hear me calling?
(Ahh... Ahh... Ahh...)
Oh ohh oh oh ohhh
'Cause every night I'm talking to the moon
Still trying to get to you
In hopes you're on the other side talking to me too
Or am I a fool who sits alone talking to the moon?
Ohoooo...
I know you're somewhere out there
Somewhere far away
(A/N: That song is on the side and it's called Talking To The Moon by Bruno Mars)
The tears keep streaming and I go upstairs to my bedroom. I sit in my bed and look outside and see the stars in the sky. Putting Talking To The Moon on replay, I look out the window wondering what Harry was doing right now. Could he be doing the same thing as me, looking out his window at the stars and te moon? Bruno Mars hit the nail on the head here, maybe we are both talking to the same moon, together but so far apart. And I know it sounds weird, but I felt really content right in that moment. Almost as if Harry and I were still together. Almost as if everything was all okay. Almost like we were both sitting there, talking to each other on opposite sides of the moon.
A/N: Yay hope you liked it!!! Please listen to this song on the side its quite beautiful and obviously is what inspired this chapter. This chapter is a filler, I'm waiting for Siobhan to catch up. Yeah so feedback would be sweet lol. ily! Vote, comment, follow, share with your friends, do something! Bye!
~Mary
