|Love means falling and I'm afraid of heights|
Josie Easton, local highschool star football player, is your average seventeen year old teenage girl with the world on her shoulders. With senior year coming to a close and Uni quickly approaching you...
I probably should have turned down Kelsey when she called and said she was coming over, all we did was argue for most of the night. The only reason I still hang around her is because we have been messing around with each other since freshman year. I saw the way Josie looked when I told her to leave, I could have came off a little nicer I guess. There is some kind of connection between Josie and I that I cannot explain, half of me wants to see where things could go but the other half wants to just do what we've been doing.
After Kelsey's car leaves the driveway I call Josie three times but she sends me straight to voicemail. I remember what street she said she lived on and I am sure her car would be out so what is the worst thing that could happen if I just stopped by to talk.
I grab my keys before heading out to my car, I have no clue what I am going to say. I pull out of the driveway entering the main road in the direction towards Josie's house. Endless thoughts are clouding my mind and I am questioning why I even care about making things right with her, we are not in a relationship.
I turn down her street slowing down a little to search for her car, I have to admit I do feel a little like a stalker but it is all for a good cause.
I finally spot her car in a driveway nearly at the end of the street. I let my wheels come to a stop slowly taking a deep breather before turning off the engine. I get out of my car and run my fingers through my hair nervously before I begin walking up to the front door.
I ring the door bell and take a step back looking around waiting for the door to open. Nothing. I ring it again and a few moments later I hear a faint sound of laughter approaching the opposite side of the door. It swings open revealing a cackling Josie on the top of Kian's back, her laughter stops abruptly and she hops down.
"What are you doing here?" She asks angrily as Kian stares at me with daggers in his eyes. I return the stare my jaw clenching before I look back at Josie.
"I came by to talk." I admit and she laughs lowly as she shakes her head.
"Why because now that she left you're bored and want someone else to deceive and mess around with? To lead me on and then make me hit a dead end? To make me think that...Wow you might actually be different?" Her jaw is now locked tight as she stares into me with ice cold eyes that I still find myself getting lost in.
"Can I just come in and explain myself?" I ask almost pleading.
"Do you want me to stay?" Kian asks her and places his hands on the sides of her arms, I am not a big fan of him having contact with her.
"No I'll be fine. I'll come by later and hang out with you and Justin." She says embracing him in her arms before he kisses her forehead and knocks my shoulder on his way out. It takes everything in me not to rip his head off right then and there.
Josie opens the door wider leaving it hanging open and walks deeper inside her house gesturing for me to follow. I step inside and I am led into the leaving room, Josie sits comfortably on the couch as I take a seat next to her neither one of us saying a word for a good three minutes.
"So are you going to say what you came to say or waste my time like you already have?" She says annoyed looking at me.
"I know I fucked up big time last night and how I made you leave for Kelsey, but it's not like we're in a relationship anyway..." I say truthfully but after the words come out I realize how bad they sound.
"If you're looking for some kind of friends with benefits thing that's not enough for me." She states.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
"I don't do relationships." I say and she does one of the biggest eye rolls I have even witnessed in my entire life.
"You really are just a fuckboy. I will not be added to the list of girls who you just go around and waste their time along with Kelsey." She says getting more and more agitated by the minute.
"What do you want? I can't be the guy that fits your unrealistic requirements that you've formed in your mind." I say and she shakes her head, "How do you know that if I haven't even told you want I want from you?" Josie says looking me dead in the eye.
"Besides I don't even know if we could be a thing, how many times have we actually been around each other when it doesn't involve banging each other?" She asks, "Then what are you asking for?" I ask back.
"I honestly don't even know myself so you can't give me the excuse that I am the one who is creating whatever it is that is holding you back." She counters back.
"Then when you figure out what you want let me know." I say before standing up and leaving her lost in her thoughts. She has me so round up and feeling confused that I feel like that conversation got us no where.
How can I be what she wants when she does not even know. I can already tell that wherever this is going, it will end badly, it always does.
•••
Don't know how I feel about this chapter, it's crappy.
