No, I Cannot Sleep Without My Teddy Bear

Chapter 23

Chapter 23

“We should um… go back,” Jackson uttered, looking anywhere but at me.

I nodded my head as I stood up and started walking back to school. My mind was racing…

I kissed Jackson.

I kissed the Jackson Evans. The guy I’ve had a crush on ever since I was five.

Whoa…

Deep breaths Ade… Deep breaths.

What will happen now?

Will he say that we should forget about it?

Will he stop being a player?

Does he like me?

Will he be my boyfriend?

Will I be his first real girlfriend?

Our friendship will never be the same again… It can either become awkward or we could become a couple…

I really prefer the second option.

I felt his gaze on me for a while but when I looked at him, he quickly looked away.

This is harder than I thought. I’m really lost right now and I want him to say something, anything. Even his face is blank!

I’m afraid to talk because I’m scared of his reaction and reply. I don’t want him to reject me…

I internally sighed. I guess I should stay quiet for now.

We got to school but the bell hadn’t rung yet so the hallways were still empty. Jackson and I had the same class now too so we had to go to the empty class together.

We reached the classroom and I sat in a chair in the third row. Jackson sat in the chair beside me, still not uttering any word.

I sat cross-legged Indian style on my chair. I know I’m weird for sitting like that on a chair but I find it much more comfortable.

I took out a random copybook from my bag and started scribbling.

Suddenly, Jackson cleared his throat and I quickly turned my head to face him, desperately hoping he’ll say something.

His blue eyes stared into my brown ones as he started speaking in a quiet voice, “About earlier…”

He trailed off, trying to form a sentence. I blushed and bit on my bottom lip, feeling the anxiety.

What will he say?

Will he cause me my first heartbreak?

Or will he make my wish come true?

I was even thinking if he would be able to finish what he wanted to say before the bell rings and students start coming in! How pathetic can I get?

I tried to convince myself that it wouldn’t be that bad…

The worst that could happen is that he’d reject you, I told myself.

But I’ve never been rejected before and I don’t think I’ll take it too well considering my enormous crush on him.

Will I turn into one of these girls who spend nights watching chick flicks and crying their eyes out. Oh god I hope not. I don’t even like chick flicks!

He groaned, “Stop doing that! I’m trying to form a coherent sentence!”

“Doing what?” I asked, confused.