crushing

Chapter 19

I'm put back on anti-depressants again and they taste like bubble gum. Today I woke up with a fuck-tastic attidude. A couple days ago was not a good day obviously and my mind was in a dark spot but I'm slowly feeling better and I get to leave my room today, yay! But there is also school, Noo!
So I woke up, pulled the covers off me. My hip is still tender so I gotta be careful and and stay away from table edges. I looked at myself in the mirror and saw dark ring circles under my eyes, I slept actually but I just dreamt of weird stuff, good dreams no nightmares. I swung my legs over my bed and tried concealing my dark rings but I gave up because nothing worked. I put on mascara on my short lashes and a little bit of eyeliner. I looked up at the mirror again, I guess I look ok, maybe nobody will notice.
I was so excited to be able to open my door and actually step outside, of my room and see my family. I turned the knob fast and bounded down the stairs, and went into the kitchen and I have no clue what the hell I was doing but I just began dancing.
"Well your excited." Mom said smiling.
She dropped whatever she had in her hands carefully and came and gave me a big hug, then dad joined in, and Alex trudged over.
"Oof!" I huffed.
I chuckled as they let me go and adjust my hat. I breathed heavily I haven't been to school for a while. You would expect being stuck in my room for weeks that I would be happy to be back, no. I finally caught up on everything but socialising is a blunt skull I have.
I ate small portions of my breakfast because I was still in somewhat pain. My mom noticed and handed me a pill of morphine to last me the day. Of course I swallowed it otherwise she would use that syringe thing that people use on dogs and forced me swallow.
The effect didn't happen fast it would take a little bit of time. But I had to suck it up and continue living the time I have.
I already have my beanie on and my outfit for the day, so there was no use getting anything else done other then my makeup and I did it kinda like a no makeup effect, all natural.
Mom huddled Alex and I out the door quick and I tried my best to procrastinate but my mom had all my things together do there was really no use.
"Aspen, don't forget this." She said and handed a surgeon's mask.
"I don't need it." I said and gently pushed her hand aside.
"I talked with your doctors it's only for a week." She said and huffed.
"I'm not going to school with that on." I admited.
My mom reached over and strapped it over my face and pushed me along out the door, "You can't miss anymore school, you and I both know that."
I growled under my breath as she shut the door behind us. I looked over at Alex who was trying not to stare and me and he was failing horribly. I rolled my eyes, and saw my mom with the keys. Oh goodie she's driving.
I did originally wake up to a good mood and now I feel it fading into annoyance and impatience. I was patient for a couple weeks but now I just wanna get stuff done and ready. I also just want this to be over with.
I hopped into the car and buckled myself in the passenger seat while Alex got in the seat behind mom.
I stretched the mask off my face and my mom reached for my hand.
"Honey I understand you don't want to wear this, but we just need to do what the doctors say." She said and strapped the mask back on.
"I don't care what the doctors say whatever they've said hasn't helped so far." I muttered.
I didn't bother fighting I was just mad and in my own mind. I didn't want to think of this, whatever the doctors see doing it isn't helping because the cancer is spreading and it's suppose to be shrinking but no.
I pulled the mask under my chin but my mom pulled it up, "You've never been so defiant."
"It itches," I lied.
"We'll buy some ointment." She said.
"And smells."
"Spray perfume, you aren't taking off that mask."
I frowned, I hate this stupid masks. It's point is to keep germs away but that's stupid it's a mask you would see at the dentist how is that gonna help the spread of germs?
The car came to a halt and I peered out my window to see the school and students huddling in. I rolled my eyes and slouched in my seat.
"I gave the nurse some morphine so if you feel anymore pain she has some. Call me anytime you don't feel good." My mom said and talked on.
I slouched even further, "Mom you can't stop the pain, it never stops." I said and and got out the car and made my way to the doors.
I felt stares of my peers on me and I just wanted to shrink away and be in my bed. I didn't want to be here, and my side really hurts.
Bailey and the girls surrounded me giving hugs.
"Ow!" I yelled.
Bailey released, "Sorry!"
"It's- It's fine." I stuttered.
Shooting pain sprang in my hip and I tried to keep myself from falling, Gigi helped me stand up right.
"Thanks." I muttered.
"Dude, Tracey going all crazy because Duncan broke up with her. She has like mascara running down her face!" Bailey said.
My eyes lit up, no surprise there...
"Yeah, she's a complete mess and blaming it on you." Said Riley.
I frowned, "The hell did I have to do with any of it?"
Gigi shrugged, "Who knows she's always playing the blame game."
I rolled my eyes. So this is what I have to come back to? I'm so tired literally. This drama is driving me nuts, I am so tired of having to deal with Tracey.
I heard the familiar clicking of heels and dramatic sniffs and out of the corner of my eyes I saw Tracey sashay tword us with some warrior look.
"Look who decided to show their pathetic face." Tracey sneered before sniffing.
"Pathetic? I'm not the one bawling." I said and did a grin under my mask.
"What are you allergic to?" She said in discust pointing at my mask.
I sneezed, "Sorry I'm allergic to your bull shit so if you don't mind sashay somewhere else."
Tracey frowned and stomped her foot, "This is your fault! All of it! Since you showed up you ruined my social stand and my relationship!"
"You ruined the relationship yourself!" Said a familiar voice.
I turned my head to see Duncan fast walking over. My jaw dropped but people couldn't see, and Tracey began frantically crying and ran over to him.
"Oh my gosh babe! You won't beleive what just happened!" She said between sobs.
"Humor me." He said in annoyance and crossed her arms.
"She just came up and began insulting me! Telling me all these things oh it was awful!" She whimmpered.
Duncan rolled his eyes, "I'm not stupid, Tracey we aren't dating anymore, period."
Tracey stopped and a tear rolled down her cheek, "Babe what are you saying?"
Duncan groaned and rubbed his temples, "Don't even bother calling me that! Look it's over. It's been over I already told you."
"W-wait I can fix this-" She said frantically.
"No you can't! You broke me once literally and I'm not gonna let it happen again." He said and frowned.
Not gonna lie this was the most fucking shocking thing ever I never planned this.
Duncan came over to me, picked me up and had my supported by his arms. I blushed when he began carrying me away and I heard gasps.
We went over to the exploratory hallway where it was empty and nobody was there. He set me down gently, and I grunted a bit.
"Drama, that's all she is. She can't go anywhere without causing a scene." He muttered.
I blinked a couple times, "oh."
My mind became groggy and I slouched against the wall and began sliding down, Duncan caught me and my eyes were struggling to stay open.
"Whoah are you ok? Do I need to take you to the nurse?!" He said catching me in his arms.
"No," I slurred, "It's the morphine, this always happens." I said swatting my arms.
"Yes I'm sure, at least this isn't the one that makes me high." I slurred with a laugh.
Duncan blushed, "Yeah I don't know what happened there."
I giggled, I tried standing up but Duncan hoisted me up in his arms again, "I'll take you to class."