[NATALIE]
Well titty shitty piggy iggy.
Iggy quite literally.
Iggy Azalea has moved in next door to us at Kanyes House.
We are all holding in our shit so when we are all ready we are going to climb onto her roof and let it all out.
It's going to be a real stinker. I'm praying nobody had green curry.
Whatever, I'm just glad to have Dylan back. I just can't imagine another fart without that boy, just the way he does it is absolutely splendid.
I stand at the top of the stairs ready to dive into the cocaine pool when suddenly I get pushed in.
"HAHAURGH SUCKA!" I hear an Aussie accent scream. I turn around wiping the White powder from my eyes to see that little bitch Iggy standing at the top of the stairs.
"YO IGGY MY PIGGY SWIGGY PINFUGGY PAGGY WAGGY SAGGY LIKE YO BOYS DAGGY BAGGY EAT MY SHIT TRY TAKE A SHIT ON MY ROOF? REALLY ON MY ROOF? BITCH YOU THINK IM DUUUUUMMB, DUMB LIKE A THUMB THATS STUCK UP A BUM, YO I GOT SE-CUR-I-TY AND YO BITCHES GONNA POO-ON-ME, I DOOONT THIIINK SOOOO. NO NO NO NO, I DOOONT THINK SOo-" Iggy raps.
Whack bam she falls into the pool next to me sending powder everywhere.
And when I think it's over she pops up face of white continuing.
"MILEY YOU BITCH!" - I look up to see Miley twerking off on the balcony - "I BET YOU PLANNED THIS! I BET YOU PLANT YO TITS ON THAT BIG FAT DI-"
"AYe whatcha yo doin' here?!" Kayne screams to the rapper.
"ITS TIME TO SHIT!" Stile's screams and we all charge at Iggy and drag her out of the pool.
Are you serious? You think we were going to shit in that cocaine pool? Do you know how expensive that shit was?
We all strip off and tie Iggy down and let it all go.
Once we are all finished we wipe and drop the toilet paper on Iggy.
At this point she looks enraged. Or is it sadness? Well her face is covered in shit so I can't really tell. She stands up from the ground when we untie her.
"THAT WAS THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER EXPERIENCED!" She yells.
We all cheer jumping up and down.
"FUCK YEAH," She screams running towards the cocaine pool.
But it's too late. The liquid is now set with powder like when you set foundation with powder. Except this is poo and cocaine.
Kayne looks more angry that ever. He grabs Iggy by her hair and drags her out of the house. He throws her into the middle of the road for which she is then hit by a tour bus.
"Oh and look everyone it's Kayne West and Kim Kardashian West!" The tour guide says over the speaker phone. Kayne and Kim start posing in front of the flashes, answering questions and take selfies with fans on the tour bus.
We all go inside and decide it's time to clean up.
Jennifer does most of the cleaning while we sit around doing practically nothing.
"So everyone I have good news!" Stiles and Jibbles announce.
"We're getting Married!" Jibbles screams showing us her ring.
It's no ordinary ring though.
It's.
A.
Lollipop ring.
