A Hamburger, And Some Other Stuff

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By now I was hungry. Ryan lead us back over to downtown and stopped at a restaurant. It was McDonalds. I had heard that they were really popular, but I didn't know why. We walked in. I looked at the menu, then it hit me, This wasn't synthetic food. It was mostly real. I was suddenly overjoyed to try real food.
We got in line and quickly ordered. As we waited, I looked around. There were plenty of chairs and people. The people came in all shapes and sizes. Some were fat, and it looked like lifting their burger would be a work out. Some were slim and more business like. Some looked like moms and dads.
Our number was called and Ryan got it. We sat at a nearby table and I looked at the food cautiously. Why would freakish food be wrapped in plastic? Ryan unwrapped his and took a bite. He smiled and chewed it slowly. He then looked at me and nodded.
I slowly picked up my plastic wrapped food. I unwrapped it and cautiously took a bite. My teeth sliced through it easily. My eyes widened in surprise, then slowly closed as the warm delicious taste seeped into my mouth. After a few heavenly bites, I regretfully swallowed it. I finally opened my eyes in order to take another bite and saw Ryan grinning like a maniac at me. I scolded at him. I was having a delicious time and he ruined it.
He said, "As much as I enjoy your expressions of complete delight, you might want to suppress the urge to look like you're in heaven. People will start to stare."
I realized that he was right and straightened. Right. I took another bite and then saw that there was something else on the tray. It was a bunch of tan rectangles. The were really long and looked bendable. I looked up to the menu in the background and saw that they were called fries.
I picked one up and popped it into my mouth. A different salty flavor filled my mouth and I almost groaned in pleasure. Now eager to try more things, I saw that there was a dark brown liquid in my cup. It was bubbling slightly. I took a huge gulp and almost spewed it out of my mouth. I burned, but it was good. I swallowed and then took a sip. It still burned. Why would they have a drink that tasted like fire?
I ate the rest of my food in no time and took small sips of the fire drink every once in a while. Once I was done I looked over to Ryan. He finished his last bite and sighed contentedly.

I started to feel a discomfort in my gut. I frowned. This was going to be a awkward conversation. I said, "Um, Ryan, sir. Where do I go to take care of necessities?"
He raised an eyebrow and replied, "Nowadays, it is called the restroom. And it is over there." He pointed to a corner hallway. "It should be pretty explainable, but your on your own."

I nodded and walked back there. I figured it out well enough, I just hope nobody could hear the racket of confusion inside the restroom. I came out a few minutes later. I was pretty sure I would have a bruise on my head from that unexpected cabinet, and why would they keep the corners of the counters so sharp?

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