Shelby LOVERS

Chapter 21 Wedding Day

I haven't spoken to Collin in 3 months and 4 days to be exact, the first month it was flowers and calls none stop but I guess he got the hint when I didn't answer. It's not that I didn't want to answer but more of not knowing what to say. Of course I miss blue eyes but it's for the best, his family hates me I couldn't ask him to choose. I miss him every day even more now because the calls and flowers stopped. What if he forgotten all about me us? Was there even an us to begin with, I have no idea what he wanted from me. I sleep in my bathrobe just because it reminds me of Collin and how he snatched my soul. Most of all he made me feel alive, he was so spontaneous and full of life. But I know it's so much more to him like he's masking himself. All is well with me and Drew he's back to his senses and Tiffany let's him off his leash. Chris and Alex are in their last trimester, we never really talked about him having a baby and being engaged. Alex ask me to be the god mother to their children but I happily declined. I mean she's nice and all but let it be known Chris was my fiancé and my babies father first, why would I want to be a god mother to his kids when we're suppose to have our own. Johan and Brianna wedding is actually in two days, these last 3 months been crazy being the maid of honor its a lot of work. Her venue is beautiful it's in the New York City public library in Manhattan. Her wedding planer is the same lady who did her opening night. I'm super excited to see how everything comes together. Brianna and Johan is having a small wedding of 100 people close friends and family only. I'm just ready to get out my funk of missing Collin.

Wedding Day.
It's the big day and surprisingly Brianna is calm, I guess that's what happens when you really know your partner. Brianna bridal party is all of 3 people Montana is the flower girl I'm the maid of honor and Johan best man. I actually haven't met him yet he had business to handle so he flew in the day of the wedding. I'm helping Brianna slip into her gorgeous Vera Wang princess gown, she looks absolutely princess like. Lisa, Bri wedding planner knocks on the door "hello lovely ladies y'all and Montana need to be down stairs in 10 minutes sharp!" Lisa is not on CB time she hates lateness. "Omg Brianna your really getting married! I'm so happy for you and Johan. Might I add you look absolutely incredible, Johan gonna have fun tonight" she gives me the biggest smile "thank you sissy, I'm nervous and scared but happy and excited all at the same time. I can't believe I'm about to tie the knot with someone who was made specifically for me. I can't wait till you experience this Shelby and maybe you have and just don't want to admit it. Now I know this is my day but here's some last advice from Ms. Jones before I become Mrs. Martinez. Listen carefully I know what you had with Collin was scary and head strong but you can't deny it made you feel alive and even Chris or Drew didn't have that affect on you. The thing is relationships are scary as fuck and taking a chance on a complete stranger is even more scary. The simple fact that this specific stranger can either be your worst or best mistake is scary. But if you don't ever take a chance you'll always be questioning yourself and who wants to go through life with regrets. So I tell you whenever a chance comes with Collin again take it. Call the man that you miss and can't stop thinking about." Brianna wipes my tears, and kisses me on my forehead. After this talk I'm so ready to get my man back. Lisa knocks on the door and tells us to come down its time. I pick Montana up we take our last breathe and walk down stairs, Lisa told us Johan was already in front waiting for her and Johan best man just arrived. As I'm waiting down stairs for the best man to come out the room I'm thinking of the right words to say to Collin when I call him. I fix myself up as the door opens and when it does I see it's Collin in a suit that matches my dress, looking freshly beautiful. I run to Brianna in confusion "what is going on? How is he Johan best man?" She looks at me with the biggest smile "I can't explain now I don't want to make Johan wait, he's been waiting long enough. Just walk down the aisle with your man." I run to Collin, hug and kiss his sweet sexy pink lips. He returns the favor and kisses me back with such desperation and hope all at the same time. "I don't want to keep Brianna or Johan waiting Ms. Jones, please take my hand and walk with me down the aisle" I take his hand and locks it with mine, as we're walking down the aisle the surprise stares we get is something I've missed so much.
While Brianna and Johan said their beautifully heartfelt written vows, Collin and I are steady keeping eye contact with each other as if every word was meant for us. The vows are over and it's reception time, everyone is talking to Brianna and Johan and all I want to do is ask how the hell they set this up. Collin whisk me onto the dance floor which gave me flashbacks on how we met. "Did I tell you how magnificent you look tonight, I missed you so much Shelby. I know I'm head strong but I never meant to..." I put my finger over his lips and stop him in his tracks. "I don't want to talk about that right now Collin, we both made mistakes but I can't deny that I miss you more than I care to admit. I know we need to talk but right now let's enjoy the dance floor." Collin and me dance the night away, I get a tap on my shoulder "hello Shelby, you look pretty tonight, I would like to speak to you alone if that's okay." I look at George debating if I should go last time he pulled me to the side it didn't actually go so well "actually I don't think that will be wise sir, Shelby and I are actually in the middle of dancing" Collin says defensively, I can tell he's still angry from what happened last time. "It's okay Collin, I'll be fine promise. I'll be quick too, don't pick up another date while I'm gone" I kiss him on his soft sweet lips. I walk over to some private area, but not to far where Collin couldn't see me "you called me over here George, what can I do for you this time. Oh and a friendly reminder don't even think about putting your hands on me EVER AGAIN!" Collin hears my voice raise and start walking over to me, I quickly put my hands up letting him know it's fine. "I'm sorry for putting my hands on you, I shouldn't have. You don't owe me or Christina anything especially not respect. Christina can be overbearing when she feels uncomfortable or nervous in situations. I understand you forgave me and I can't expect you to instantly forgive Christina when she never apologized. She's not a bad person and all I'm asking is for you to give her Blake and Yasmine a chance. I know this is none of my business and I know I'm not in the position to give you any advice on your love life. I don't know Collin well just like I don't know you but I can tell you two both love each other even if y'all haven't realized it. The way he feels the need to protect you at all cost, that man just doesn't like you but he's deeply in love with you. The love y'all share is pure don't ruin it because of difficulties." As he's speaking about me and Collin tears come to my eyes, how come everyone can see Collin and I belong together but me. George doesn't know either of us but he's absolutely right about this. I know I've just met Collin but something about him makes me love him, makes me crave him in ways I can't explain. Collin sees me crying and he's by my side in seconds "what did you do to her? If you hurt a hair on her head I will tare you apart. Why is she crying?" I grab Collin hand "it's okay Collin I'm fine me and George was just having a little heart to heart. Nothing's wrong promise." I look a George and give him a small smile "I know I have no place saying this Collin but take care of my little girl. And if you hurt her you won't have to worry about anyone else coming after you, because you'll be already dead." I look at George surprised and trying to contain my excitement that he finally becomes the dad I always wanted, "yes sir, she's in very good hands." Some type of agreement was just exchanged between them in this conversation, Collin gives George a handshake and whisk me off outside. "Why was you crying love?" Collin looks at me wondering what's really going on, "I don't want to tell you, I feel like we're just getting back to whatever it is and I don't want to ruin it." I'm scared shitless to tell him we literally just got back together or whatever. But at the same time I'm 28 and I want more than just breakfast in the morning and sex at night, I need to know if this can ever be something more. "Shelby? Are you going to talk to me and tell me what's going on?" I look at Collin scared and about to be as open as possible, not actually knowing the outcome. "Collin I...I...I feel a very strong connection to you. In our short time I felt a feeling I haven't felt with Chris or Drew. I'm scared all the time and I'm scared of us. I'm scared that we can be so great that it might not workout. I'm scared when I left you not because I knew we wouldn't work out but I knew we would. When you stopped sending flowers and cards I knew I lost you. The difference of our skin color scares me also, I never did this and the comments and stares scare the fuck out of me. I'm scared that one day you'll wake up and realize I'm not the woman for you and you will pick up and leave. I'm scared that I'm falling for you, and you don't know me and I don't know you. And once you find out who I am and what I've been though, all you'll see is damaged goods. I'm scared that your family will forever dislike me and come between us. Most of all I'm scared that I'm in love with you already and you're not in love with me. even though everyone said they can see you love me too." He stares at me without blinking, not a word comes out his mouth, before he can talk his cell phone rings "yes okay, that's fine I'll be there in one hour don't do anything until I come." He never takes his eyes off of me while talking on the phone. "I have to go Shelby I'm sorry, I'll call you later enjoy your night" he reaches down and kisses me on my lips,this kiss was different he was scared. What I told him just scared him off, I look at him as he walks away with tears down my face.