Grey Hearts and Flowers

Who's Your Bunny?

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"Mr. Grey, I don't know if I feel comfortable with this," Taylor whispers as we stand together, locked in my walk-in closet. I would've taken him downstairs into my office to show him my items, but Ana's office is right next door; plus she's been wandering about, readying the house and the children for the party and I definitely don't want to risk exposure.

"What do you mean?" I ask, holding the head of my monstrosity up for him to get a good look. "Why don't you feel comfortable? We've done worse than this before."

"Yes, but I'm definitely for certain Mrs. Grey wouldn't approve of this, sir."

"Who's the boss around here?" I ask. He just looks at me. "Don't answer that." We all know it's Ana, but does he have to emasculate me so overtly in my own closet? "Come on, Taylor, I need your help."

"Yes, sir." He's hesitant, but agreeable. That's all I need from him.

"What do you think of it? Honest opinion." I hold my hands out for him to see it.

"I'm not sure what to think of it, sir." He crinkles his nose in assessment, almost as if he's smelling a flower he thinks may have the capacity to eat his face off. "I've only seen smaller versions and that was years ago when I was a teenager in boarding school, but they weren't near the quality of yours, sir."

"You went to boarding school?" I thought he lived in the Ozarks or something with his Annie Oakley mom in a cabin they built out of sticks, stones and tin can donations.

"It wasn't a fancy British school abroad or anything. We just didn't have a high school in my town, so they housed us four towns over in bungalows. And we had a lot of what your holding busying about the grounds. It was actually our mascot."

"This was your mascot?" What kind of weird fuck place did he go to?

"It wasn't an official mascot, but everyone knew."

I don't want to know.

"Forget about your rah rah school days and check this thing out." I hand him the full hairy beast.

"It's quite heavier than I expected, sir." He manipulates it a bit and I can tell he's impressed. "And the head is enormous!"

"Of course it is. It's made for a man."

"Well, it's not made for a woman. She'd break her neck trying to steady it. How do you stand upright with it, Mr. Grey?"

"Taylor, I work out with Claude. He gives me three times the weight of that to play with daily."

He's impressed, I can tell.

"What exactly are you going to do with it, sir?"

"I'm going to strut all over GEH on Monday with it and lead a parade downtown." I roll my eyes. "What do you think I'm going to do with a rabbit costume on Easter? I'm going to be the Easter Bunny."

He stands back and stares at me like I'm Red Riding Hood saying she's gonna shack up with the wolf after a lunch of grandma.

"I thought we were just keeping an eye on that man playing the part, sir. I didn't know you were intent on playing the part yourself."

"How long have you known me, Taylor?"

"Far longer than I ever expected to, sir." He sighs.

"And in that time would you ever think I'd let some idiot play the Easter Bunny over me?"