Grey Hearts and Flowers

We've Got a Really Big Show: Part I

Hi guys! Thanks for your reviews and support of my stories! It means the world! If I make you wait, it's because I want to take my time to give you my best. Thank you for your patience! There will be a Darker update soon, I promise! I'm chopping this one up, as there is a lot of material. Hope you enjoy and there's way more to come! I was thinking about doing a one shot election story where Phoebe runs for preschool president and Christian heads her campaign... xox

"The witches are coming! The witches are coming!" Phoebe yells as she bounds down the stairs and into the living room dressed in full revolutionary garb as Paul—or rather Paulette Revere for the show today. I'm tempted to ask if Aunt Kate and the photographer are here, but I refrain.

"Phoebe, it's the British, not the witches," I say. "And it's not Halloween. It's the Fourth of July." Chester, who's on her shoulder in a powder blue wig and tuxedo tails that frame his own, stands on his hind legs, hissing at me for no reason other than the fact he wishes me harm. Typical. Who would've ever thought a hamster would tell me to go fuck myself daily and I'd buy him a Versace wardrobe.

"Oh yeah. I forgetted again." She scrunches her nose up at me. "Why can't it be Halloween yet? Or Christmas!"

"Because you have to have fireworks before you get the costumes and candy, and then once you deal with some colossal turkey and a Black Friday it's all tinsel and candy canes from then on out." I think I just described Ana and my love story in a holiday themed nutshell. Though we had more than one colossal turkey to deal with, and after all this time the photographer's still around.

Speaking of turkeys...

"Can Boone come with us to our boat, Daddy?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"He could accidentally fly up and fall off, and he doesn't know how to swim."

"Uh huh. Teddy and I teached him in his bubble tub." Oh that's right I had a therapeutic bath installed in that barn bachelor pad for what Phoebe called his achy leg muscles from having to carry around so much chest. Elena complained about that after she got silicone double d's.

"Swimming is not the same as bathing," I say. Maybe I should embroider a towel with those words and gift it to Elliot.

"Oh no!" Phoebe gasps. "I almost didn't 'member to give Boone his happy birthday 'merica socks." She pulls out a pair of Stars and Stripes knit booties—made to fowl specifications— and then starts to take off for the yard.

"Not so fast." I catch her and kneel to face her. "You're not running out to the barn by yourself in those colonial death trap shoes. You'll slip. Plus, it's too far. What are the rules?"

"Don't go walking off without your mommy, or your daddy, or your Taylor," she recites.

"And how long do these rules apply?"

"Until I'm thirty."

"Exactly." I know that's ridiculous. It'll last way past thirty.

"But, Boone will be sad and his feet will be naked and he can't celeb-er-ate the birthday of 'merica right if he has no sparkles and cold toes." She looks up at me all pouty, lip quivering with disappointment, just like Ana. It stabs me through the heart every fucking time.

"Okay, tell you what. I'll give it to him. But, you keep your own revolutionary toes out of the mud and slippery puddles." I look to the colonial rodent who looks like he's about to defect to my neck by way of his teeth. "That goes double for you, Chester." Of course he hisses at me.  And then I notice he has the same patriotic socks. Who's making these things—Gail?