Still bored.More T-shirt quotes and funny random stuff.
"Upon the Advice of My Attorney, My Shirt Bears No Message at This Time"
"That's It! I'm Calling Grandma!" (seen on an 8 year old)
"Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew Up"
"Procrastinate Now"
There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved by a suitable application of high explosives.
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons because, to them, you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.
"Rehab Is for Quitters"
"My Dog Can Lick Anyone"
"I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts -- Do You Want Fries With That?"
"Party -- My Crib - Two A.M." (On a baby-size shirt)
"If a woman's place is in the home WHY AM I ALWAYS IN THIS CAR!"
"ALL MEN ARE IDIOTS, AND I MARRIED THEIR KING"
"A hangover is the wrath of grapes"
"STUPIDITY IS NOT A HANDICAP. Park elsewhere!"
"They call it "PMS" because "Mad Cow Disease" was already taken"
"He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless dead"
"POLICE STATION TOILET STOLEN......Cops have nothing to go on."
"HECK IS WHERE PEOPLE GO WHO DON'T BELIEVE IN GOSH"
"A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS--But it uses up a thousand times the memory."
"Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana."
"HAM AND EGGS - A day's work for a chicken; A lifetime commitment for a pig."
"HARD WORK WILL PAY OFF LATER. LAZINESS PAYS OFF NOW!"
"The trouble with life is there's no background music."
"Two rights do not make a wrong. They make an airplane."
"MY WILD OATS HAVE TURNED TO SHREDDED WHEAT"
"Computer programmers don't byte, they nybble a bit."
"Quoting one is plagiarism. Quoting many is research."
Work fascinates me-I can look at it for hours.
Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
I intend to live forever - so far, so good.
Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
There are two kinds of pedestrians - the quick and the dead.
You're so boring, if you threw a boomerang, it wouldn't come back to you.
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Ooooo funny signboards.
In a veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"
Door of a plastic surgeon's office: "Hello. Can we pick your nose?"
A sign on the back shield of a car: DO YOU BELIEVE IN LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT OR SHOULD I DRIVE BY AGAIN?
On a Plumbers truck: "We repair what your husband fixed."
Pizza shop slogan: "7 days without pizza makes one weak."
At a towing company: "We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."
On a maternity room door: "Push. Push. Push."
At an optometrist's office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."
In a restaurant window: "Don't stand there and be hungry. Come on in and get fed up."
In the front yard of a funeral home:
"Drive carefully. We'll wait."
On a California freeway:
Fine for Littering
In a Kansas City oculist's office:
Broken lenses duplicated here
In a barbershop:
During vacation of owner, a competent hair stylist will be here
At a bookstore:
Rare, out-of-print, and nonexistent books
NOTICE IN A FIELD: The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but the bull charges.
