At the end of the day all we have is memories

Wanna die? Fall for someone you know you can't have

So I kind of have a thing for this guy who is in his late 20's and I am just 20 which means we are in two completely different stages of our lives. He has a steady, "grown up" college teacher. He is at the age where people typically start settling down and looking to get married and start a family, while I am at the stage where my life is really just beginning. He has completed college and that portion of his life and I haven't even begun that part. While it seems like that would be a deal breaker, it isn't. It all depends on the people involved in the relationship and what each person wants in their own life. The older may want to get married, while the younger partner may want to explore life, travel, and just enjoy themselves. Typically, people my age aren't looking to "settle down" just yet, a lot of kids my age are looking to go to college, make friends, have a little promiscuous sex, and experiment with alcohol and what have not. I'm not the type of person to well, do things. I don't like things like that, so settling down doesn't sound too bad to me, but to other people that are more social and ambitious, that may sound horrible. So, it really all depends on you as a person but to me settling down it's something I often think about see I'm very self conscious about myself and never thought any guy would want a girl with stretch marks or a tummy I'm not a "normal" sized girl.
I just want to see a guy smiling and know that's he's mine and seeing him smiling will give me nothing but bliss to know he's actually happy and I am too. Wanna know the hardest thing about liking older guys is my brothers mostly likely know them and partied with them and they will never look at me as a woman but as my brothers little sister which sucks trust me. Everyone thinks if you go After older guys that you're only after their money in which I don't care if you have money or not money isn't gonna make me think less of someone because they don't have money
I just want the companionship. I've realized guys my own age just want to see how much booty they can score in a years time and I'm not into that I want a future with someone who isn't about that who actually wants a family guys my age want to hit and leave don't care if the girl gets pregnant they leave that girl to raise a baby which they both created don't get me wrong any guy and leave but i don't know it's different with him I can see myself with him raising a small little family enjoying life and thanking God everyday that I was patient with him.