A Girl's Guide to Guys and God.

Jealous?

This entry is once again, (please readers don't be annoyed) on Barry. This one kind of relates also to my previous part "Taking My Own Advice". If you want to read that before continuing.
Barry is on the school track team. How good he is I seriously don't know. I don't exaggerate at all when I say. I am a a TERRIBLE athlete. My sports are dance and marching band. If I try to play sports-- especially running-- it's just embarrassing. Anyways.
This girl "Sally" is in Barry's running group and I didn't even know that until...
I was sitting in English and it was the end of the day and were we all just sitting around talking. Well I overhear another one of my classmates picking on Sally. He keeps asking her teasingly about Barry. I could tell that he was applying that Sally and Barry liked each other.
I figured out that I REALLY liked Barry when any time I was in his presence or someone was talking about him I would weirdly tense up and become overly conscious of how I looked or trying not to trip or whatever. I dart my eyes away from him and try not to draw attention to myself. I just get this weird feeling in the pit of my stomach.
So I hear this conversation going on and I do my weird tense up thing and then what happened next surprised me. I wished it were me running with Barry. I was just sad. All all-around sad.
I guess I'll tell you how we all stand at school. I'm a marching band nerd. Barry's a student section boy. Sally's a cheerleader. Yep. A cheerleader. It's a common fact that usually the boys go for the cheerleaders not the band nerds. I don't know this about Barry but in overall view. The guys like girls in short skirts with a sparkly bow rather than a baggy, unflattering band uniform and their hair tucked into a hat with a feathery thing on it. [BTW it's called a plume not a feather].
It gave me a pang of an emotion I don't feel very often. I pang of what I think was jealousy. God's word says that we shouldn't covet. That also includes wishing for an experience someone else is having. Technically, feeling jealous in my case is like wishing to be that other person, which breaks even more of God's rules. Girls, I look back now and feel bad that I felt like that. Now that I see that Barry and Sally are just friends. Even if they weren't that's not the point. The point is that I am me and Sally is Sally no matter what's up with Barry.