My Own Worst Enemy

chapter five

Vanessa's point of view

I sat around a fire with Calum and our kids and they ate popsicles as I played the guitar. "And maybe, I'll find out, a way to make it back someday, to watch you, to guide you, through the darkest of your days." I sang and the kids watched me with smiles.

"Is this on your new album sweetheart?" Calum asked and I nodded. "Who wrote that?" He asked me and I hummed

"Me, Andy, and Cisco." I said and he nodded. "When we were opening for a band, we were thinking about home and this was the result." I told him and he smiled.

"Mama, are you gonna leave again?" Dakota asked me and I looked at the guitar. "Because I missed you when you did."

"I missed you too then babygirl, you too Eli." I said and he smiled. Calum looked and me and I ignored his gaze as I looked at the guitar.

"How about you guys go inside and get blankets and pillows? We can lay out here for awhile." I said and they ran inside as they giggled.

"We need to talk." He said and I nodded. "We seriously need to talk."

"I know." I said and ran a hand through my messy, nappy hair. "We can talk when we get home."

"Yeah." He said and nodded. I leaned into his hug and he rubbed my back. "It's gonna be okay." He said, already knowing why I was so nervous and afraid.

He kissed the top of my head and then whispered softly. "Don't cry beautiful. Come on." He said and wiped the bottom of my eyes a bit.

"Mama! I got them!" I heard the kids yell as I looked at them as they ran over. I chuckled and stopped them before they got too close to the fire.

Calum laid a blanket out and I tossed a pillow on the end, which Calum flopped down on. The kids laid beside him and I sat on the end of it, wrapping the kids in the blanket.

"You're not gonna lay down mama?" Eli said and I shook my head.

"Nah, I'm fine love." I said and Dakota sat up with me. "Be careful baby, I don't want you getting hurt." I said and she used me like a chair, sitting in the middle of my crossed legs.

I wrapped my arms around her and she giggled. "Mama, are we staying the night here?" She asked and I shook my head.

"Probably not sweetheart. Daddy and I are gonna drive home later and give you both baths. Aunty Ana and uncle Ash don't even know we're here." I said and she nodded as she leaned her head back on my chest.

"Daddy, can you sing a song?" Eli asked and Calum chuckled. "Please daddy? Mama did, so it's your turn!"

"Yeah daddy." I said and he glared at me. Dakota agreed and I laughed when he grabbed the guitar. I looked at him as I attempted to run my hands through Dakota's hair, which wad nappy as shit.

"Mama that hurts!" She said and I apologized as I kissed her head. "You always do that." She giggled and I nodded.

"Only because I love you." I said and she rubbed my leg as Calum played a song. "Oh no." I said and he nodded.

"Everybody's got their demons, even wide awake or dreaming," he sang and I turned away, looking into the ocean water as the sun set. "I'm the one who ends up leaving, make it okay."

I closed my eyes and set my chin on Dakota's head as I held her hands, making sure they were well aware from the burning wood. "See a war I wanna fight it, see a match I wanna strike it, every fire I've ignited, faded to grey..."

Calum please.

Dakota clapped her hands when I let go of them and I sniffled, actually crying because it's been so long since I've heard that song. I looked at Calum and he was actually tearing up himself. He looked at me and I have him a smile smile, mouthing 'fuck you' to him aswell.