Coincidence, I Think Not! (Darren Criss)

2: Questionable Bok Choy

"Well well well, what do we have here?"

“I didn’t do it!” Darren cried, twisting his head to face me. His eyes were saucer-like and his mouth was agape. "I didn't even know you had a dog!"

"Sure." I responded slowly. "It looks more like you've just killed my dog with a pot..."

“Oh god, I’m so sorry Minnie… I just walked around and found this little guy next to the door. I accidentally dropped that pot but that didn't hit him...” Darren said looking depressed. He hung his head low as he slumped his way in front of me, awaiting a lecture. "I'm sorry."

I quirked a brow at him. "You're sorry?"

"Yeah..."

I pinched the bridge of my nose and turned away. I felt myself shake a little and in my imagination, I could see Darren freaking out behind my back. I wasn't crying or angry...really at all. Seeing my little Dalmatian lie on the floor like that with his tongue rolled out and his body stick still...

“Alright boy, stop being a zombie and give mommy a kiss."

All of a sudden he popped up like a daisy and happily pawed at me. I giggled as he licked my hands, sniffing around for his reward. I smiled brightly, reaching over the counter to pick up a dog treat. I threw it into his bed to the corner of the room, watching bemusedly as he ran after it. "Good boy Turtle!"

Darren did a double take. "What sort of sorcery is this?!"

"Don't worry about it. He rises from the dead ALL the time. " I joked, giving him a mock pat on the shoulder. "It's no big deal."

"That's not funny." He pouted, looking away haughtily. "I actually thought I killed..."

Just then, my dog ran back, his paws making clicking sounds across the floor. I looked down, leaning my hands on my knees with a huge grin still on my face. "How's my little champ? Do you want to show him that trick again?"

He wagged his tail.

"I think that's a yes!" Quickly I stepped back and put my hands together, posing them as a gun. I pointed my fingers at Turtle and pretended to shoot him.

Turtle jumped onto his back and played dead.

"What a smartie pants." It always warms my heart to have such a smart dog.

"I think I love you." Darren deadpanned, his eyes set on Turtle.

My face fell a tiny bit but I made sure to not show it. No I wasn't jealous of my dog...of course not. That would be just ridiculous. "Hey urm, shouldn't we be heading out now? We only have half an hour before the reservation."

"Oh sure, sure..." Darren laughed, not really paying attention. "We have time."

"You still need to dress up..." I reminded honestly.

His face dropped into a frown. "Oh yeah..."

Sighing, I shooed Turtle back into the living room. 

"Let's go Romeo."

"Romeo huh? I kind of like that."

"You do do you? Well tell that to the next sucker who falls for you. Leave my dog out of your manipulative charms."

"You're just jealous." He taunted, placing his hand on the door frame. "Jealous that I'll steal him from you."

"Psh, yeah." I snorted. I slipped on some flats and started walking back to the car, stepping out into the freezing cold. I hissed, rubbing my arms with my hands. How could the weather keep dropping like this? “Let’s get going, Romeo! I'm cold"!