Natasha: We all need to discuss something.
Steve: What is it?
Peter: It's actually quite a large problem.
Natasha: So, Peter was recently injured, as you all know.
Tony: Git rekt
Peter: Rude
Clint: I still don't understand how he was injured
Peter: Because I was trying to respond to a group text while someone was trying to kill me.
Clint: Dude wth
Thor: WHY WOULD YOU DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT, ARE YOU SOMEHOW LACKING A LARGE AMOUNT OF BRAIN CELLS?
Bruce: Guys. WE HAVE ALL DONE THIS
Clint: Noooo- oooh wait
Natasha: EXACTLY
Peter: I WAS STABBED
Tony: I thought that you were completely immune to small knives
Peter: Shut up and go roll in money or whatever you do in your spare time
Tony: I take personal offense to that
Steve: All of that aside, we also have another problem.
Clint: It appears that we do.
Maria: WHAT DID YOU IMBECILES DO THIS TIME
Steve: I did nothing
Clint: DON'T MAKE ME TAKE ALL THE BLAME FOR THIS, MAN
Steve: Blame the elf
Natasha: What did you even do?
Bucky: i was 100% not involved
Maria: The missile flying towards us right now?
Bucky: correction i am, in fact, 100% involved
Steve: Bucky be quiet
Clint: Let's just call it a team effort, ok?
Bucky: i just wanted to order pizza
Bruce: Soo... you tried to order pizza and you ended up launching a missile?
Bucky: that seems about right
Tony: SERIOUSLY DUDE HOW DO YOU EVEN DO THAT?!
Bucky: life is harder when you have a metal arm
Natasha: What do Clint and Steve have to do with this
Clint: I accidentally programmed missile codes into his cell phone
Steve: Well actually it was a phone that wasn't supposed to be used but I gave it to Bucky
Maria: WHY WOULD YOU EVEN PROGRAM MISSILE CODES INTO A CELL PHONE YOU COMPLETE IDIOT
Clint: I assure you, it seemed perfectly logical at the time.
Steve: And so did handing Bucky the phone with the large 'Do not touch this phone' sign on it
Thor: IT APPEARS THAT THERE IS A MISSILE HEADED TOWARDS US
Tony: No shit
Bucky: am i in trouble
Fury: YES YOU ARE, YOU MORON
Scott: Anything I can do to help?
Maria: Not at the moment
Scott: Then where's the soda machine
Maria: Ask Fury
Fury: Ask Phil
Scott: Got it
Natasha: So there's kind of a missile headed towards us, are we actually going to deal with this situation or not?
Clint: That seems smart
Natasha: You did this, hush.
Clint: Heeeeey it wasn't ALL me.
Natasha: Shhh.
Steve: LESS THEN 50 SECONDS
Bucky: soooorry
Fury: Barton, Rogers, Barnes, Stark, take care of the freaking missile.
Tony: WHY MEEEE
Fury: Because I'm ticked off at you.
-Fury has left the chat-
Tony: NICE, REAL NICE
Bruce: JUST STOP THE MISSILE, OK?!
Steve: AAAAAAAAACK
-Steve has left the chat-
Bucky: steeeeeevvvvveee
-Bucky has left the chat-
-Clint has left the chat-
-Tony has left the chat-
Thor: ARE THEY BEING REMOTELY SUCCESSFUL WITH THIS MISSION?
Wanda: Well, we'll see about that in about 30 seconds.
Natasha: ...
Natasha: We're doomed.
So I think that Ron's prediction from Divination will finally come true tomorrow while I'm watching Civil War... I'm going to suffer, but I'll be happy about it.
YOU ARE READING
Avengers Texts
FanfictionSteve the Frisbee Grandpa, Tony the Internet Troll, Mom Natasha, Caps Lock Army Thor, and much more Here is yet another Avengers Texts, so you can find out how completely irresponsible they all are in their spare time. (I wrote this so long ago an...