Mine, Always

Chapter Twenty Nine

Parents evening is something every child dreads, we all know how well or how crap we are doing in a subject and it's just a way for our parents to check up on us. I hated it because all the teachers always said the same thing "his grades are great but he could participate more." But my argument was, if I was doing well why did I need to have a conversation with the whole class? Seriously Sophie was enough for me, I didn't need to talk to anyone else thank you very much. As well as having to see my Maths, English, Science, History and god knows what other teachers my parents also had the wonderful pleasure of meeting both my coaches. All the teachers set up a base camp of sorts in the assembly hall and then we had the joys of going around and seeing them for ten minutes each, most kids book slots beforehand; me included, others just sort of turned up and hoped that either none of their teachers were free (because let's face it if you can't be arsed to book appointments your grades are probably not something you want your parents to know about) or that they were free and you didn't have to wait ages to see them.

Years 7 – 9 had their parents evening the week before and years 10 – 13 had theirs tonight. I knew without a doubt I would see Zach floating about but I tried to ignore the fact that pretty much every person in the hall would know we were dating but my parents and just stay calm, so far it seemed to be working.

"Who's next?" Dad asked me after my science teacher had moaned for ten minutes that I really should participate more in group experiments.

"Maths." I say groaning.

"Mr Jennings," Dads reads from the sheet in his hands and I direct him past 6 other desks before I see the teacher we need.

The next four teachers say pretty much the same thing, I know the answers but I don't put my hand up to give it, and I barely participate when called out to do so. My English teacher Mrs Johnson also adds that less conversation with Sophie might be useful to my grades but as I'm getting an A (and I know Sophie is too) she isn't too bothered.

"Well son, you seem to be doing well," Dad tells me putting his arm around my shoulder.

"I agree, totally the opposite of your brother." Mum says laughing.

And I remember; Bobby never used to work in class he was too busy being the clown, living life and then he came here and didn't do that much work unless Andrea made him – the thing is though Bobby is smart – just like the rest of us and he aced all his exams he just didn't have the patients for lessons.

We head out of the hall and for the cafeteria; that's where the P.E teachers are and well that's where Coach Lazarus and Coach Turner will be as well. Plus it gives mum and dad the chance to try the food they serve here; well if they are that desperate I guess.

We just round the corner when I see Zach and his dads and Sam and who I assume are his parents, there is a lot of laughing and joking and touching on Sam's part and I instantly feel sick.

"Well one day I hope he will be," I here Sam say and I dread to think what he's talking about.

Sam parents look just like him, both blonde with green eyes and both are good looking, his mum is slim but not too thin and is clearly wearing no make-up and still looks perfect. His dad is an older version of himself. I groan inwardly as I know mums spotted them.

"Oh Tom look its Zach," She says and waves when Chris and Ryan spot her.

"Has he got a new boyfriend?" She asks and I'm confused for a moment what on earth does she mean new?

"Huh?" I say and she ignores me completely and walks over to them all.

"Hello Sally," Chris says giving her a hug and I see it throws her and she laughs.

"Hey," I say as I reach closer because what the hell else am I meant to do.

"Hey Tom," Zach says I can tell that Sam instantly realises my parents have no idea and he takes full advantage of it, he introduces himself to my parents while slipping his arm around Zach's waist and all I can do is watch as my boyfriend is being pawed in front of me and is doing nothing to stop it.

Mum starts talking but when Sam leans in to kiss Zach I can't watch so I walk off shouting over my shoulder that I need to see coach, mum apologizes for my rude departure and follows me, dad then follows her.

For the next half an hour while we are at school I am angry at Zach for not stopping Sam, I am angry at Sam for starting it in the first place but by the time we are home the only person I am angry at is myself.

I'm not sure why but I ignored Zach for the next two days, I don't take his calls or answer his texts and I hide from him in school – I even miss swim practice which I have never done in my life, but I feel like coach will be ok with it as I told him it was a family thing and that I'd make up the practice time at the weekend. By Friday though I'm finding it hard to dodge him and I know I need to go to practice, we have a swim competition a week from Saturday and I know I need to be there with the team to go over final preparations.

It's just after school when my luck finally runs out and Zach corners me in the car park while I'm on my way to track.

"Tom, Jesus will you stop!" he shouts at me and I don't even bother to pretend I don't hear him; I don't want to cause a scene.

"What's up?" I ask and he nearly runs into me; I guess he didn't expect me to stop.

"What's up? Are you fucking kidding me?" he shouts and as people stop to look at us he pulls me around the corner.

"Seriously Tom, what is going on, why are you ignoring me?" he asks.

"I – look – I, why didn't you stop Sam from touching you, from kissing you?" I ask him and again I've surprised him by answering.

"I had a go at him after you and your parents left, but I couldn't go after you could I Tom? I couldn't reassure you that I wasn't interested in Sam because your bloody parents were there!" he shouts at me and I can see that he's shocked he's shouted at me but at the same time I can see he feels better.

"I can't do this Zach," I say looking at him and then at my watch; I'm already late for track.

"I know, you have track, I'm sorry," he says and he moves towards me to do what I don't know.

"No I meant this – us," I say gesturing between us.

"I'm sorry?" He asks and he actually sounds surprised.

"You are right; you deserve a boyfriend that you can show off, that isn't me." I say and I'm surprised I'm so calm.

"I don't-" he starts and he looks panicked but I try to ignore it the best I can.

"We are over Zach, leave me alone." I tell him and then I run to the track field. I am changed and on the field in minutes but I'm 15 minutes late and Coach punishes me by telling me to run suicides up the bleachers again, I'm a mess; for the first 30 minutes I just run and then what I've just done sinks in and I'm crying and even though I try to stop I can't, I don't stop running though and it's because I can barely see that I miss my footing on a step and trip. I fall face first up three steps; I have the sense to be grateful I was going up and not down, I can already feel the blood seeping down my leg and I just give up and lay sprawled across the steps hoping that the ground will swallow me whole and this whole year would have been a horrible nightmare.

The field is empty when coach finally comes over to me.

"I sensed you needed to be left alone son, but I suggest you go home, I'll let Coach Turner know I sent you home because of an injury." He tells me and I guess I feel worse than I look.

"Thanks coach," I tell him and when I stand my leg doesn't even really hurts there's just quite a bit of dried blood.

I don't even bother changing I just head home in my track kit, jump in the shower and then get into bed and finally I let myself cry probably; I ignore my phone; messages and calls from Zach, Sophie and surprisingly Ben and I ignore mum trying to find out what's wrong. I close myself off from the world for two days and hope that when I remerge I will be ok.