It's Thursday. It's snack. I still haven't talked to Katherine yet. Nor she has talked to me. I see her sometimes. In the hallways. Going up the stairs. Flitting about here and there between groups. Flirting here and there. I know she sees me too. She looks like she doesn't know me. Like I'm a invisible or something. Well, I'm not. Oh some weirdo. I barely know her. Her words bounced around in my head. I sigh, weary of life.
All those summer camps we went to together?
Tears start to form.
All those times we hung out in the backyard?
They come out from the corners of my eyes.
All the laughs and inside jokes we shared?
I swipe a tear off of one cheek.
The secrets that we told each other?
And the other.
Fictional characters we fantasized about?
Both.
Those late nights staying up together at a sleepover?
I squeeze my eyes shut.
Crying over TV shows while eating a whole pint of ice cream and a box of Cheerios?
I bury my face in my hands.
And you still don't know me? You still. Don't. Know. Me.
I rest my head down on the table, feeling the bumps and grooves in it. Sobs escape my throat.
Stop.
A hand lands lightly on my shoulder. "Hey," I hear Ben's voice.
I try to stifle my sobs, but it's useless.
"What's wrong?" he says.
What's wrong!? My life is wrong! Me being born was wrong! I say nothing.
"Ok, maybe that was a stupid thing to say," I hear a tiny smile in his voice. "Want one?"
I look up and see that he's holding out a tissue. I glance at him for a second then hide my face in the tissue. "Thanks," I say quietly, though I doubt he heard me.
Turns out he did, "No problem."
My sobs slowly turn into sniffles, but I still can't talk properly without hiccuping, or having my voice crack. A steady silence follows. The only sound that there is is people chattering and laughing. I start to look around, and Ben's eyes stare at me. I stare back. After a while of staring he breaks the wall of silence, "It's Katherine isn't it?"
I nod. "How--" I hiccup.
"I've only seen you with hang out her, or Levi. And you're sitting here by yourself. Well, not anymore."
"Oh." I expect him to ask a nosy, annoying question like, 'What happened,' or whatever, but he doesn't. I like that.
Another silence.
I hear a bunch of footsteps coming our way, including a bunch of giggles and hushed tones. Ben and I both look at the group of people who've arrived at our table. Katherine's in it. "Hey Luna!" she smiles widely, like she's in a photoshoot for a new clothing line.
I say nothing back, but glare at her and turn to Ben.
She pouted her lipstick dunked lips. "What's up, Luna?" there's a hint of mocking in her voice. In the corner of my eye, I see one of her friends in the group whisper something in another girl's ear. Both girls snickered then covered their mouths. Katherine sits down and attempts to touch my shoulder to probably repeat the question, but then I burst, "Don't flippin' touch me you--"
Ben stops me by saying my name. He looks at me with eyes saying, Don't say anything!
I stare at the ground, fire blazing in my eyes.
Katherine's hand is frozen a good inch or two from my shoulder. The group is dead quiet.
I stand up, looking at the rest of Katherine's paparazzi angrily. I then slide my backpack onto my shoulder and storm off, not looking back.
