"I'm sorry, Zayn..I just can't take this anymore; you always hurting me then saying you didn't mean it. It's just too much" I say my voice cracking while I'm trying to hold in the sobs and my tears threatening to fall. But I couldn't show him that I was hurting. He needed to think that I was through with this.
"But...But Ara... you keep me sane! I can't do this without you. You're the only color i need."
"I'm sorry Zayn. But you drive me insane" I entangled my fingers from his and headed towards the door. Just as I put my hand on the door knob I heard a chocked sob escaping from Zayn's lips. The lips I wished so badly to kiss.
"Fuck it." I spun around, sank to my knees and wrapped my arms around him. I could feel his tears soaking my shirt. I could feel my heart aching physically every time a sob escaped his lips."I'm sorry... I'm so sorry... Baby, please. I'm not leaving, I promise. I'm yours. I know that I can't be your light and you can't be mine...because both of us are part of the darkness.
But I can serve as your anchor to the light for the rest of eternity...as long as you're mine.
I can remind you where you belong in case you forget, I can guide you back home in case you get lost, I can keep you grounded for as long as you try to save me from the monster i'm becoming. For as long as you try to pull me out of the dark black abyss I'm getting sucked into. For as long as you can hold onto me. For as long as our hearts beat. For as long as it takes to save me from the chaos inside my mind. From the misery that's taking over me. From anything and everything that I've become. And I promise that i won't give up on you for as long as your eyes shine. For as long the sun rises. For as long as the earth spins and wounds sting and our hearts sing. For as long as eternity is. For i am yours if you'll have me. And you're mine and that's enough for me."
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Hiraeth.Malik.
FanfictionHiraeth: a homesickness for a home you can't return to, or one that never was. But in her case, her home was a person so warm she didn't feel the need for walls and a door. And it was like I could only see her and nothing beyond her. None of those...
