Preferably In Bed Sheets

31/03

My phone hasn't been switched on since Tuesday. It's now Friday. Dad and Sian have both come down with the flu and I have convinced mum I have it too to avoid having to go to school or seeing Harrison who has called every single day. I don't want to talk to him, I wouldn't know what to say.

Mum has been slaving in the kitchen and in her glory because it's very rare she gets to play nurse to her family. This is probably why she so easily looked over my fake cough and obvious pale foundation I plastered on my face. In the past two days, I have consumed eleven bowls of soup. Today it's been four and it's only coming up to three o'clock.

"Delilah, I have to go to the shop and get more vegetables. Could you tend to Sian and your dad if they need you. Thanks."

The sympathy still never changed with my fake sickness. Maybe she has finally caught on but not willing to lose the extra help. I put down the book I was reading, jumped out of bed and pulled a hoodie out of my drawer. The apartment felt drafty, and I felt regretful for leaving my bed. I heard my father's snores and chatter coming from Sian's room. I learnt from having to share a room with Sian that she sleep talks, mostly about the Vampire Diaries.

I went into the kitchen to see if there was anything without leafs and vitamins. I switched the kettle on and prepared a cup with coffee. As soon as the kettle boiled, I heard a loud nonstop knock on the door. I rushed quickly to it, afraid of the noise waking my sister or dad. I unlocked the door, expecting to see the police or someone with the emergency in the noise. Instead, it was a tall lanky blonde with a scruffy haired boy.

"Where the hell have you been? We've been worried sick," Paige pushed her way past me, Alex following with a more relaxed face.

Paige stood with her hands on her hips waiting for an answer. By the express on her face, I could tell she's in a pushy mood. She's also too loud. I grabbed both my friend's wrists and dragged them into my bedroom. They deserve an explanation to my absence for the past few days, and furthermore everything with Harrison and Jessie.

"Why haven't you been answering our calls? You missed Casey Carlisle have a melt down in Biology because she had to dissect a frog."

Alex blabs when he's nervous. He hates my home and is probably waiting to see the vicious beast of my mother. Paige sat on my bed, studying me and my stance.

"Well," I began, "When you both thought Harrison and I were going through a good patch, we basically broke up. I found a text on his phone and thought he was cheating on me. Jessie then came to the rescue on Sunday night and was amazing the next day. Then Harrison showed up telling me he is falling for me. And now Jessie and Katie have broken up and they are telling me to pick between them. That's why I've been off. I need time."

Paige had her poker face on, clearly thinking this all through. Alex looked lost completely and I knew that i would be getting no advice from him. It was all down to Paige to help me with her biased opinion.

"I can't believe all this. It's like something from a movie. Listen De, this is the part where I'm suppose to tell you to pick a boy because he is so much better looking with a great personality. But I can't make this decision for you and neither can Alex. You know how much I adore Harrison, he's such a sweet guy with loads of character but Jessie looks at you the way every girl wants to be looked at. You have something powerful with both and either way you'll be losing something special. The only thing I can say is take your time to figure out who you want or more importantly need. Until you figure out who that person is, you should avoid them both. And you have our support."

That's something I needed to hear. I feel stupid for not coming to Paige earlier with this problem but I didn't think that was what she was going to say. I'm not sure where to go from here. I should make a list. Or is that stupid?

I don't know.

I hugged them both, only realizing that I missed both my friends dearly. I haven't seen any of Sian's friends come check up on her. I should be so grateful to have friends who actually care about me.

"So tell me what happened with Casey."

***

Paige and Alex left before mum came back. I promised Paige that I'd turn my phone on and text them both every day, even if it was just a full stop. It was just to show I'm alive.

I lay on my bed, staring up at the ceiling, wondering if Jessie was doing the same directly above me. I went over Paige's words again and again in my head.

"Take your time to figure out who you want or more importantly need"

"... you'll be losing something special"

I think I have figured out who I need. I think I've known it the whole time but scared of the answer because I don't want to need them. But I don't want to lose them. If I leave it any longer, I'm risking losing them. I want to be looked at the way all girls do. Who wouldn't?

Come on Delilah, you can do this.

I went for the handle but caught my reflection in my mirror. Big romantic gestures require a better outfit than sweats and a hoodie. I dragged my hand across the different fabrics in my wardrobe until I felt the softness of silk. I pulled out my silver halterneck pencil dress, my navy ballerina pumps and the small blue box with my dream catcher necklace and feather earrings. After changing, I ruffled my hair to make it look more attractive then I was out my bedroom door, past my mum leaning against the fridge stirring something and to the front door.

I opened the door stepping out and bumping into a lovely .

I pulled back to see who's chin met my forehead. Of course, it's Harrison. It's always Harrison. This is too important to have him interrupt it again. Not this time.

"I'm sorry, I'm just heading out."

His eyes rolled over me and I wanted to feel repulsed but it made me feel sexy. He was looking at me in a way I've never been looked at before. Delilah, focus.

"You look beautiful. I just wanted to see if you were okay. I've called a few times and your mum said you were sick. Delilah, listen. I love you. I know you probably don't feel the same way but I have fallen completely in love with you and I feel like an idiot standing here telling you but it's consuming me and I need to know if you feel the same. Do you?"