How to not be a Jerk ✔

Chapter 3

So, Everything was pretty much going well.. I had become the type to get a flower and pick each petal off one by one saying. "He like me..He likes me not." 

Did that actually help?...No! He was still insisting we were enemies and all because I humiliated him (His words not mine) For speaking out and asking for their opinion.. Do I write too much or is because I actually have an imagination.. Unlike him?.. who is still writing one story for the past year..

Anyway.. where was I.. Ah yes I Remember now.. my usual rant about Alex Crawford.

Eventually I managed to get him to admit he actually liked me. I know what you are thinking dear reader, It's actually turning into a love story like love actually or something. Come to think of it, from what I remember about that movie there was actually a jerk in that one as well played by Hugh Grant?.. I could be wrong but hey!.

The conversation was going pretty well.. I got him to open up (believe me it took a while.) He told me he had two jobs.. One as a Marine and One as a call centre dude.. selling insurance.

He constantly got annoyed that I had disappeared on him. He was so lonely.. I apologised and told him I had stuff going on at home.  I was grieving for the loss of my best friend for a while.

He decided that we would be better off as friends to begin with. Before that though he was toying with me.."It depends on what you want whether you want to be friends or enemies."

Me: "I obviously want to be friends.. I hate falling out with people and like I said.. I apologised for what I did."

Him: "Nope we shall still be enemies my dear."

I rolled my eyes at that last message. "Let me guess.. You're saying I have to work for it?."

Him. "Yup.. pretty much."

He did actually send me messages like: "Eh, getting over old relationships and freaking out that I have no real friends."

Me: Aww you have me.

His reply: Online doesn't count as real friends. Sorry dear.

Like I said after I managed to get him to open up a little bit.. I asked him what he wanted.:

"I just want to be in a relationship with a awesome woman."

I decided to tease him a little bit. "oh yeah do you have anyone in mind?."

His reply:" Well I had you in mind but I didn't want to force anything."

Around a month later after that. I got a message from him.

"Hey sorry only just got your message. I'm getting new internet in a few weeks"

Him: "It's okay. I realized you probably don't want me anyway."

So after all that hard work trying to get him to open up.. and then after losing my internet he decides he doesn't want me anymore. "I said that because I only want you physically right now. Because of your great looks. I'm not ready for you."

So I said that I understood.. I'm not the type to pressurise anyone.. never mind be with anyone just for "Sex."

I repeatedly asked him if he wanted to go back to being friends. But to him being friends changed everything.

Me: If you miss me then.. why does it change anything between us?. I want us to still talk.

Him: Because I have needs baby girl. I love talking but sometimes a guy just needs more.

It felt like I had to work harder all over again.. I don't know why I like him.. Why I liked the banter and the mysteriousness of it all.. but I guess after losing my best friend.. I just wanted a friend.

It had been pretty much around 4 years maybe since my last boyfriend. I had maybe 4 boyfriends in those 4 years and then this guy came along winding me up and ever since.. all the arguing and the flirting.. I couldn't get this guy out of my mind.

Maybe its because I feel a need to be friends with everyone.. Even though I've learned that is impossible. I always had this thought in my head: "If Everyone was friends..Then there would be no war.."

I have got to get this guy out of my head...