all I wanted; ministar (discont.)

01

"Hey guys.. I can't record right at this moment, go on ahead without me," Vikk said nervously to the Skype call. Everyone was puzzled by this. We were 20 minutes away from starting a recording, why didn't he say anything sooner? He wasn't one to just to skip recording with at least some more warning before hand.
"Vikk is something wrong?" Harry questioned.
"It's just- nah don't worry about it.." He trailed off, wanting someone to inquire but to his dismay and satisfaction no one did. It was both a blessing and a curse.
"Okay well if you're feeling better later let us know Vikk," Of course I cared but in this moment I needed to get a video up and he was stalling everyone's progress.
"Thanks Si."
Something was just so off about this situation, this is such a weird move even for Vikk. I used my better judgment and did what I had to do.
"I need to check on him, start if you guys want."
I excused myself like Vikk did, I needed to investigate. Vikk is definitely more important than any video.
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I left the skype call and sighed. Something just didn't feel right. My anxiety levels were sky high for no reason. But I knew I couldn't record like this. Maybe it was time for my second dose of meds. I stepped back from my computer chair. I knew none of them really cared. But they would ask me if I was okay. It was all a stick to make themselves feel better if something ever did happen to me. But did I mind? Not in the slightest. I knew I was a huge liability and should be grateful for this. I don't know what to blame really so I kinda just throw it into YouTube. YouTube was getting so much harder, the grueling hours and continuous demand to stay relevant took a toll on me.
I opened my door and headed for the bathroom. I love when everyone else in the house is recording. The residents of the house were focused on something over than me, which was truly a great experience. I walked to the my shared restroom. I kept my antidepressants in the medicine cabinet disguised as a bottle of Advil but in sharpie it had my name on it so the Josh knew not to touch. With soft force the cap popped open and took two of the blue pills in my palm. These pills were the key to one thing, my sanity. I would be normal with them. My cup sat there, so I filled it with water and took my pills. I smiled feeling the placebo affect of mundane happiness. I returned to my room with Simon sitting on my bed thumbing through a little notepad I kept by my desk.
"Wha-what are you doing," he looked up at me with a soft frown.
"Oh you know just learning a little more about my bestest friend in the whole wide world." He said sarcastically. "You take a lot of pills for a 20 year old, is that healthy?" I try snatching my book away, there were things in there only for my eyes.
"Is that any of your business?" I ask again snatching and failing to retrieve it.
"It is my business if you show up dead in this house Vikram."
"Don't fucking call me that," he held me tightly in place. He wanted to control me, and me being stubborn, I wasn't having one bit of it.
"I'll call you whatever I want little boy," his hands trailed to my thighs.
"Are you fucking drunk or something Si, you're straight, I'm straight (a complete lie) . Just stop touching me."
"Says here you'd love me to fuck your brains out, hmm suck foul language from a sweet baby."
"What is the point of this, please explain before I start screaming." He placed me down and took a step back.
"I really wanted to make sure you were okay," I raised an eyebrow.
"So instead of being rational and asking me you decided to invade my privacy?" I questioned trying to wrap my head around his logic.
"You always say 'I'm fine Si'. You know I hate liars. So I became a detective. I was trying to look after you. This helped me," he said handing me back my notepad.
"I know you were trying to help but next time just ask me when all the guys aren't around." He nodded and shuffled uncomfortably.
"Can we talk about what's in that pad?"
"Sure, talk."
"I don't really know what we're are in terms of relationship, but I'd say we are a peg above a friend.. I- I really like you Vikk "
"I like you too Simon, and I argee with our stance," I was content with that answer. No commitment or pressure.
"I'm going to nap.. I'm oddly tired."
"You work your little body to the core," he smirked.
"You can work me to the core.." His cheeks tinted and we both laughed. This didn't seem like friendship, but neither of us cared.
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Word Count 856
First chapters are always a little boring but it gets good, trust me. <3
-em