It's your Baby (A Nash Grier Fanfic) | COMPLETED

Chapter 58

Nash's P.O.V

I was lying in bed, my eyes closed, my mind elsewhere. I've never felt this way for anything or anyone. What is happening to me? Why can't I control it. It is more than obvious that she doesn't want to see me ever again. But the constant reminder that I promised that I wouldn't go anywhere is right at the front of my mind.

The guys offered to take me to eat something, but I denied—like I have done ever since the day I spoke with Gwen at the park. I haven't eaten properly at all. I didn't feel like it anyway. What's the point of being anything close to happy when she is probably bawling her eyes out? Well, she is strong, no doubt on that. Maybe she is smiling, maybe she forgot me already. . .And the bare thought of that kills me. Dammit, I am so fucking cliche, but can you blame me? I am so hurt right now. I was an asshole, I know that, but I didn't want to take things so damn far. 

I keep thinking on what to do to get her back. . .

How is she doing with the baby? Does she need me? 

Even though we're not exactly on speaking terms, I have the right to know. . .I honestly just want to see her, I miss her smile. I miss her hugs. I miss just everything. I've never felt anything like this, it feels so surreal, but I have to admit that that girl has me head over heels. 

"You should be cast for the Walking Dead. You look like a zombie" I heard Cameron. I sat up straight and locked gazes with him. I groaned, which made him laugh. "Yup, just perfect for the role" 

"I am not in the mood for jokes, Cam"

"Sorry, just trying to lighten the mood" he said. I let go a heavy sigh and got out of bed. I directed myself to our fridge and grabbed a fresh bottle of water, taking a sip. Cameron crossed his arms across his chest and furrowed his eyebrows as he checked my expression. 

"I know, Cam, and I appreciate that you're trying to help me. . .Although you shouldn't"

"Why not? You are my best friend" he smiled, walking towards me. 

"Yeah, but I am also an asshole" I said and took another sip. 

"I've known you for too long, I am used to you being an asshole" he said which made me punch his arm. 

"Grier, stop the violence!" he said, rubbing his arm. I chuckled and scratched the back of my head. "Maybe it's time for you to call her. . ." he said as he sat down on one of the black leather couches. I shook my head repeatedly and opened my eyes widely. Is he crazy or something?

"What? No. . .I can't. I know she's still pissed. I can't fucking blame her. I would be just as mad if she would've lied to me too. I don't think I gave her enough time yet so we can talk again. Plus, what the hell am I going to say to her anyway?"

"You can start by saying how much you love her, and what a fucking idiot you are" he said. "Besides, you are the one that promised not to let her go. . .Are you breaking your promise then?" he asked, making me go quiet for a moment. I sure as hell don't want to break that promise. I said I was going to fight for her, I do love her, and losing her is not an option. She is indeed the only girl that has been able to make me feel genuinely happy. As always, Cameron is right, and if I keep waiting, things will get worse. But if I try to do anything and come into the picture once more, she will remember why she wanted this break. Dammit, what the fuck do I do now? 

Cameron stood up from the couch and patted me on my shoulder, offering me one of his comforting and reassuring smiles. "I know you will do the right thing. You know what has to be done. And believe me when I tell you, that girl loves you, Nash, she truly does. . .But right now she feels like you don't and that you have given her up. If you love her and promised to fight for her, do what you feel is best. Do you want to be in her life, or do you want her to move on and forget you? Think about it, Nash" and with that, he walked out the door, leaving me in this desolated and dark room, alone with my own thoughts. 

I grabbed my phone from my nightstand and stared at Gwen's phone number. Should I call her? Did I give her enough time? Is she still mad? All these questions are roaming through my head and are making me more anxious. I want to hear her sweet voice once more. I want to hear her laugh. I want to hear her say my name. . .

I let go a heavy sigh and pressed the green call button, and it rang exactly three times until I hung up. I pressed my phone against my forehead and had a constant war in my head about if I should do it or not? I want to talk to her and fix things, but my nervousness and fear don't allow me to man up and call her. I am scared of her being hurt again. I am scared for her to scream at me and to tell me that she hates me. I am scared that I will push her even more over the edge to the point she will permanently block me out. 

I am so damn scared it hurts me.  

But you know what? I made a promise and I don't want to break it. For Gwen, I would do anything. She deserves so much more than what she has right now. It is my fault she is pregnant. It is my fault that she is receiving hate. And it is my fucking fault that she is heartbroken right now. 

Now that I remember it, she asked me to be her Prom date after this incident, even though now she doesn't want to see me. But fuck it, I will go. I will tell her how I feel and how fucking sorry I am. . .I won't leave without a fight. And she won't leave me until at least she hears out everything I have to say. 

___________________________________________

{A/N~ Hey my lovely readers!!! I hope you're having a fantastic day full of love and achievements. You know, I've been having so much fun writing this book. And I would like to obviously dedicate it to a few people here on this web site. 

WhatAGrierDay Your Comments and positive words always bring a smile to my lips. You're probably my biggest supporter. Even if I did a HORRIBLE Chapter, you will always say something nice. You always read what I write and make sure to comment on it, or vote for it, anything to show your support. You're always trying to make people happy, you're so funny, AMAZING, friendly, supportive, and kind. God bless you girl! Thank you, I love you so much!

XxxLost_SoulxxX Even though we JUST started talking, I came to realize you are possibly the SWEETEST girl ever!!! You have awesome friends with who you call brothers, and I can't help but feel happy for you. You support this book so much along with Alex (My Rant Queen). You guys treat me like if I was, well. . .Your sister. You make me feel even more happy—even more than usual—and never fail to bring a smile to my lips either. You are kind, funny, and trustworthy. You care for those around you and have the best intentions. And you may be the only witness I have when Alex tries to kill me with your spatula if he doesn't like the ending of the book *chuckles nervously*. So thank you guys, from the bottom of my heart. I love you GURLY. PSST, PSST *I love you more than Alex. But don't tell him*

-voidallison This girl is just awesome in general, and her Book Cover tips were my salvation. Seriously, she taught me things I didn't know before, and thanks to her, my book cover making skills improved. Of course, she may not read this, but I just wanted to put out there that she is a talented girl. YOU SHOULD GO CHECK OUT HER BOOK COVER TIPS, she may save you as well ;) 

Thank you to everyone who reads this. This book is dedicated to ALL of you as well. Yeah, is not a popular book. But writing is not about Comments, Votes, or popularity in general. I don't write this Fanfiction for the views, I write it for the public's enjoyment. I love to write (Even Fanfiction)—although I am 17 lol—I love seeing that I made someone's day with just a Chapter. I write because it is something I feel passionate about since I was very young and want to share with the world what I have to say. 

Phew! That was probably the longest Author's Note I have ever written. I love you guys. Ignore my emotional and cheesy self. That's who I am. But I love it though.