The Riveting Lives of Russell and Sal

Chapter 15

An asexual. Russell couldn't believe his luck. It did explain a lot, but now what? Russell didn't want to break up with him, but he also wanted things to eventually progress further than mild make-out sessions. He hadn't even put his hand up his shirt yet, and it had been several weeks since the sleepover.

But he had other distractions. Holiday break had begun, which meant Christmas with his extended family. He loved Christmas as a child, but now he dreaded it. Not even the gift cards he'd get made the ordeal worth it. He glared at the "Jesus is the reason for the CHRISTmas season" plaque in his grandparents' kitchen with enough intensity to set it on fire. Or so he wished.

His grandparents had a large rectangular table in their dining room, long enough to sit eight. Russell sat next to his father, who sat next to his mother. His Aunt Clara and Uncle Tim sat across from them. Their son, his cousin, sat directly across from Russell. Jeremy was a couple years younger than him, and was his least favorite relative.

Then came the usual praying over the usual ham, followed by the usual "what are you doing after high school?" questions.

His uncle, who looked similar to his father, asked, "Have you got a girlfriend yet?"

"Tim!" Russell's mother interjected. "He's not allowed to have one."

"Never stopped me." Tim winked at Russell. "The boy's 17. He's old enough to date."

"I'm not interested in anyone," Russell said hastily. "I'm focusing on my studies."

His mother beamed, pride shining in her eyes. "See, he has his priorities straight. And after college, he'll find himself a good wife who'll be grateful he remained pure. Isn't that right?"

If he stuck with Sal, he'd have no problem remaining "pure." But part of him wanted to destroy his purity out of spite.

"His future wife will have more experience than him if he keeps this up," Tim said. "Any pretty girls in your class?"

Russell shook his head, though it was a good question. Come to think of it, he'd only had one crush on a girl, back in middle school. His others had all been boys, aside from-

"Are you still planning on becoming a lawyer?" Clara asked.

Russell opened his mouth, but his mother answered for him.

"Of course he still is."

"And he'll be a great one," his father added, giving Russell a rare smile.

Being a lawyer was one of the last things Russell wanted to do, but it had always been his parents' dream. A highly successful son bringing in 6 figures. They would accept nothing less from him. Not that he didn't have his own dream job. But it was dumb, embarrassing, and his parents would never approve.

"Russell, you need a haircut," his grandmother said. "You look like a girl."

Russell had been waiting all day to hear that comment, and he put his fork back down. "Some boys have long hair."

"Only rock stars and hoodlums. I've yet to meet one who-"

"I have a boy friend who has long hair," Russell said. "He's not-"

"Ew! You have a boyfriend?" Jeremy crinkled his nose. "No wonder you're not interested in girls."

"Jeremy, don't joke about that," Clara said.

Jeremy stabbed his fork into his ham. "He said boyfriend, not me."

"I meant a friend that's a boy." Russell tried keeping his voice level, but failed.