Still Waters

Chapter 31

                                  ** MATURE CONTENT AND STRONG LANGUAGE AHEAD **

Things got really bad when I found out that I was pregnant. That's right, pregnant. If that's not a wakeup call, I don't know what is. The thing about it, though, is that it didn't wake me up at all. In fact, I fell deeper into my blissful nightmare and forgave Collin even more for acting like an ass. I guess I figured that I was stuck with him now, so it was better to just learn how to live with the man that I chose.

The only thing that I couldn't forgive, that I actually became more defensive about, were the little middle school hang up calls that either came more frequently after I got knocked up, or that I was just beginning to really pay attention to. It was like I had a heightened sensitivity to the sound of the telephone ringing and, as if hypnotized, I could literally feel my mind snap every single time I heard it. Every single time.

One day, I literally did snap. Just like a rubber band...

But I had good reason.

Trust.

The bitch actually had the nerve to call my house, not Collin's, in the middle of the day when she knew I would be there and Collin wouldn't, and this time asked to speak to him.

That was my first time hearing her voice. And it was different from the other girl's.

When I told her that he wasn't home and asked her who the hell she was, she laughed like a little silly ass kid and slammed the phone down.

That was the last straw.

I met Collin at the door when he came home.

"Collin, who was that trick ass bitch that called me in the middle of the day asking for you?"

Amusement passed over his face. "How the hell should I know?"

"I'm not playing with you Collin. Who was she?"

The amusement quickly faded and anger slinked into its place.

"No," he said calmly. "I'm not playing with you." He closed the door and took a step closer to me. "What the hell was your lazy ass doing home in the middle of the day?"

"It's summer vacation, Collin. Don't be mad just because you have to work year round."

"What I am mad about is how damn fat you're getting. If I had known you would pork out like that, I would have made your fat ass join Weight Watchers with my coworkers when I had the chance."

"Whatever Collin. I still wear the same size I did in college." And it was true, I did. However, slowly but surely, he was making me feel more bloated and ugly by the day. Especially now that I had his big-head baby on the way.

The absolute hardest thing for me, though, was that since I found out about the baby, I couldn't just ignore Collin or escape an argument by snorting or smoking myself into oblivion -which is what I had gradually started doing on the regular the more time Collin...and his side hustle...spent at my place. There was no way he didn't know I was getting into his supply, either. I think he just cut out a piece for me and left it out on purpose, since I was way more tolerant of his nonsense when my nose and lungs were full.

"...and you drink too much," he called after me when I started to walk away. "And quit smoking up all my shit. I have to sell that shit to keep piling food into your big ass stomach!"