Still Waters

Chapter 63

AUTHOR'S NOTE: THE SONG LYRICS USED IN THIS CHAPTER ARE IN NO WAY AN ATTEMPT ON COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT. THEY ARE JUST REALLY GREAT LYRICS.

**SONG LYRICS WERE NOT INCLUDED IN ORIGINAL COPYRIGHT OF THIS BOOK**

I didn't hear from Kenney again for the rest of that day and most of the next day. I figured that he had just disappeared on me again. I couldn't be mad at him, though. We had been doing that to each other off and on for years.

But then he showed up at my door. Again. Without calling.

            "Hey."

            "Hey. Can I come in?"

            I stepped out of the way. "I thought you left."

            He looked at me. "I was supposed to...but I didn't."

            "Tenney!" Sammie stopped twirling around on our makeshift dancefloor and ran over to him. I was trying to tire her out so she would take a nap. That day she was super wound up, just like I was.

            "Hey Charlie Brown." He picked her up and gave her a tight squeeze. Then he looked at me. "Can we talk?"

            "Sure." I took the baby and walked into the kitchen, sitting her down at the table. I fixed her a snack to keep her occupied while we talked.

            Kenney sat down at the table next to her. "I just...wanted to explain why I left yesterday."

            "It's cool." It was really the opposite of cool, but I was over it. I had too much going on to add one more thing to the pot, anyway.

            "Tashi," Kenney grabbed my hand when I walked past. "Don't do that."

            My eyes got big when he grabbed me, and Sammie's probably did, too, because he let go of me immediately. I stepped closer to the baby, and slightly out of his reach. The repositioning wasn't lost on Kenney, but he didn't say anything about it.

"Don't do what?"

            "Don't act like you don't care when I know you do. I had to...make sure that I could handle it. You know what I mean?" I nodded. "Before...I went any further with you. I don't want to hurt you. I would never hurt you like Collin did, but I could still hurt you. Listening to you made me realize that you've been hurt...a bunch of different ways...too much already. Maybe even by me. I thought he just hurt you physically, but he hurt you in a way that...I could hurt you, too. And I wanted to make sure that I wouldn't do that to you."

            "I'm good."

            "I know you're good. I just had to make sure that I could make things better for you and not worse. You understand?"

            I nodded and walked back into the living room. Sammie was still young, but she was smart and picked up on emotions quickly. I figured there were too many emotions swirling around my baby right then.

            "Kenney...I meant what I said yesterday."

            "I know you did." He suddenly looked around. "Aw shoot!" He spun around and did a quick Moonwalk to Sammie's Disney tunes. Sammie, who had been watching us the whole time from her booster seat, laughed from the kitchen. "What's going on in here? Somebody havin' a rave?"

            The music was blaring and I turned it down, chuckling. "You're silly."       

             He laughed. "I missed you. I miss you whenever I'm away from you. I always have."