Ancient History/Future Hearts

I'm Not Over You

i woke up to the sunlight invading the bunk. it was a beautiful day outside. i tried to check the time on my phone, but i hadn't plugged it in the night before, so the battery was still dead. great. i quietly got up, trying not to wake anybody up. i thought they were all still asleep and i was right. almost. i got to the main area and saw Brie sitting at the table. she was typing on her phone but perceived i was there and looked up. she gave me a huge smile.

"good morning! how are you feeling today?" she asked sweetly.

"like crap" i simply said.

she got all serious. "look i was thinking... why don't we take the day for ourselves? hang out a bit. just the two of us. away from... everybody"

i knew who she wanted to take me away from. i had to think about it for a minute. would i rather spend a day with her alone or have to face Maxx, Cody and the others? i picked the first option.

"-kay" i said.

she seemed happy with my decision. i quickly got dressed and we left the bus. we started walking down the streets. i had no clue where we were going but Brie seemed to know exactly the way. we got past many houses and finally got to a shopping street. she didn't stop though and i wondered where she was taking me. i knew we weren't going to the city center. the venue itself was far away from it and we were heading towards the outskirts. we walked in silence for a while. we reached an area with just fields. fields everywhere. we kept walking.

after a good hour we finally reached a small village. it was actually just one bar and a couple of tiny houses. but there was a lake there and it looked awesome. we sat down on the small deck and Brie took out of his bag a couple of chocolate bars, two apples and a bottle of Tropicana. "breakfast?" she asked.

i happily grabbed a fruit and started eating. again, no one was talking.

at a certain point she turned to me. "did you see it coming?"

i gave her a quizzical look even though i knew perfectly what she meant.

"i already know everything" she explained. "Alex told us. he was scared. he saw you running away and got worried, he didn't want to hurt you. i know he didn't"

Pause. "i'm sorry it ended up like this. but it'd have never worked. and i don't think you were really in love with him. he was your celebrity crush. but there's a difference from real love".

i knew she was right. i couldn't argue on that point. i was feeling bad because i was embarassed obviously. because i thought i'd lost my best friend. because i'd given up on my chance with Cody. Cody. i missed him so bad. i just then realized. it was pretty obvious i could have never been with Alex. i didn't love him. but Cody?

i started to wipe softly.

"Aww" she said hugging me tight. "what is it that is bothering you now?"

"i just lost everything i had. i've been so stupid. Brie i don't know what to do"

"everything's going to be alright again i promise you. probably sooner than you think. hey i'll tell you what" she said letting go of me and looking me in the eyes. "we can chill here for a bit. maybe sunbathe. have something for lunch at the bar. then we go back to the venue. and see the boys perform. i mean, both All Time Low and Set It Off"

i hesitated "i don't know if that's the right thing to do..."

"please" she said and put her hands together as if she was praying for a yes.

i sighed. "ok"

it took longer than we thought to get back. Brie insisted on stopping at a few shops on the way and we ended up being a bit late. Set It Off had just started the first song of their set. instead of going backstage she suggested we watched the show from the front. we found a nice spot at the right side of the stage, just between the stage and the barrier. we were all lateral so nobody really had anything to say - most of the crew knew who we were anyway.

i couldn't help but staring at the boys in awe. i hadn't seen them play in way too long. they played some new songs off Duality and some old songs as well. i was waiting for that song though. the one that had changed everything. but it wasn't coming. i started to get anxious. three more songs, Cody announced. they started playing N.M.E. it wasn't it. two more. Swan Song. not the one i was waiting for. one left. my heart started beating faster. the first guitar riff of Ancient History invaded the venue and i felt as if i was about to faint. and i promise i'm not exhagerating. old memories invaded my mind.

my brain started to sing along but i couldn't move my mouth. i was just staring at Cody. he never looked at me though, nor for one second. and without me even realizing it ended. Cody thanked the crowd and everybody got off the stage. i was feeling numb. i wasn't feeling anything anymore.

but there was one more surprise for me.

Cody got back on stage after a couple of minutes, his acoustic black guitar in his hand.

"alright people i'll tell you what" he screamed in his mic "i want to make this night special for everybody. i have one more song for you. and old, old one. it's called I Promise and it goes like this"

he started playing. i turned around. the dark venue was lit up by lighters and torches. it looked incredible. i looked back at Cody as he started singing.

If you step back and realize

I'm sure that you'll see,

That these words that were spoken, eventually

Will dwell in my conscience

Till my dying day.

Oh what can I say

he still wasn't looking at me. but just before the chorus, he took a quick glance at me as if he was checking i was still there. that's what i thought at least. maybe he hadn't even looked at me at all but i could swear i had seen it. i tried my best to calm down and contain my emotions. we all saw what had happened last time i got my hopes high. 

Cody kept singing.

So I'll wait for you,

even though you don't want me to.

Because I'm not over you

I promise, this word they call love

Come push or to shove

I meant it and now I'm in tears

My love

i felt my heart exploding in my chest. a sense of calmness invaded me, even though i was shaking. i closed my eyes and made the words mine. i knew that song well. i'd never actually seen him play it. i didn't know him yet when he wrote it and i don't know, i guess there hadn't been a specific occasion for him to sing that particular song in front of me. i still loved it. i could feel the words flowing into my ears and invading my brains. i felt the calmest i'd been in a long time.

unfortunately it ended too soon. i had still my eyes shut. my brain started screaming again. i wanted more of that peace. i wanted to hear that song again. i finally opened my eyes when the lights were turned on again. Cody had already disappeared backstage.

Hello! sorry i didn't upload yesterday but i've been pretty busy these days. if i have to be honest i'm not particularly proud of this part but i still wanted to share it with you. Maybe it's a bit too sickly sweet for my liking but i promise the future ones won't be all like this and a bit of romanticism is needed sometimes. well if you liked it let me know, cause i can change a bit my writing to make you guys happy :) also, if you don't know it already, go listen to I Promise by SIO, it's such a good song and i love it so much and you will probably understand why i decided to put it into this chapter. Thank you guys for reading and i will see you (hopefully) soon!