The World is Ugly, But You're Beautiful to Me. (Frerard)

『❷⓪』

Frank

"Why don't you come eat with us? I'll pay for you man" Ryan spoke to me, smiling and nudging me a bit.

The day had passed by with blurred faces and all my teachers asking how I was. They all still thought my grandma had died, and with me being as moody as I was, it was probably believable.

"I'm not sure Ry, it's my first day back after 3 days of being a bitch at home, I got make-up work I need to start on" I told him, it was more as an excuse since I sure as hell knew I'd only complete half my make-up work.

"Well, I'll help you with anything I can. I'm not sure how many of the same teachers we have, but Ray's coming along too, so I'm sure he'll be up to showing you some of his papers" Ryan offered. I smiled at him, chuckling.

"Yeah, okay whatever. I'm not going to be a fucking party starter or anything, but I shouldn't pass up free food" I agreed, shoving Ryan in the side. He grinned at me, and then ran off to find Ray and whoever else was coming to eat with us.

I sat near the front gate of the school, turning quickly whenever someone passed with jet black hair like Gerard had dyed his only a couple weeks ago.

Soon enough Ryan had returned, along with Ray and a kid I had only known due to him having an insane reputation named Pete.

"Come on, ya assholes, let's get going" Ryan spoke. I laughed a bit, getting up and dusting my ass off before following him towards his car.

-

Gerard

"Don't be mad when I tell you this, like just don't be irrational or do any crazy shit" Ray spoke to me over the phone. I sighed, scratching the back of my head and laying back in my bed.

"Look, this week hasn't been good, as you know, and I haven't done anything more than break some shit in my room. I'm sure I can handle whatever 'important info' you need to tell me" I reassured him, rubbing my temples. Ray was making me nervous, and I didn't want to be nervous. I was already filled with regret, nervousness mixed with that is not a nice feeling.

"Well, you know Ryan? He's cool and all...but I sorta think, like maybe he's a bit...into Frank?" Ray said, making me confused.

"Weren't him and Brandon or whatever-his-name-was dating?" I questioned.

"They were, but something went sour. Brendon did something, Ryan left. Whatever, that's not the issue. I can't say anything to him, because technically Frank is single right now, but when I was out eating with them Ryan just seemed so interested in Frank. And of course Frank and Ryan have been friends for a little while, but Ryan only complimented him and was smiling at him the whole time and I was freaking the fuck out because what was I supposed to do?? Scream "GERARD IS SUCH A GREAT GUY DON'T YOU THINK?", like I was so lost at the moment" Ray explained to me, saying it all so fast and making me paranoid.

"Well... I don't know what to say Ray, I mean obviously I'm pissed, but not at Ryan really, just more at the idea of others wanting Frank. Of course someone would want him, he's amazing" I sighed.

"Oh geez, alright alright Frank is rad but don't go on another "Frank is a god" rant please" Ray told me, and I could almost hear him rolling his eyes.

"Shut up, okay? Don't tell me anything about Frank then! Just hearing his name brings praise for him out of my mouth."

"Fine! I won't tell you anymore about Frank" Ray said. We both stayed silent for a minute.

"...Please keep telling me things about Frank, you're my only source of news and updates" I sorta begged to Ray, and he laughed.

"Of course, but can't you ask Mikey?"

"Mikey feels awkward about the situation, I think he's kinda mad at me for not being able to explain to others why I broke it off with Frank. I know he saw Frank last night, so he must've seen him in a bad state or something. He wouldn't share anything about Frank besides telling me if he's okay."

Ray sighed at my explanation, and I heard him say a quiver of a word, but he quickly stopped.

"What were you gonna say?" I asked him, and he sighed again.

"Just, well I don't know. I thought it'd be better if you just called him. Asked him how he is. It must sound insane to you right now with how jumbled you are about the situation, but you gotta remember Gerard, you were and probably still are his best friend. He wasn't social before you, and none of us knew him until you knew him. Just Patrick, but even he said Frank wouldn't really go into great conversations with him. Even if you're broken up, you are still who he's closest to" Ray ranted, and I hated every fucking word because it was all so true.

Now I was the one sighing. I didn't know how to follow up. I didn't want to admit how much I wanted to call Frank but was equally terrified to do so. How was I to explain to him why I left him like that? Especially since my reasoning is "I was scared". Scared of what exactly? My father not wanting me? Myself not being enough for Frank? Fucking pathetic. I choked back telling all that to Ray as I heard him waiting on the phone.

"Well," I said, looking down at my feet, "good night Ray."

I heard Ray sigh one last time. "Think about it Gerard, good night man."

I hung up, let my phone fall on my bed afterwards as I slumped down onto it as well.

Maybe that wouldn't be a bad idea, to call Frank.

What the hell are you thinking? You'll only hurt him more.

I laid back, closing my eyes to try to clear my mind.

I felt myself drifting off, but then my phone started ringing.

I swear to fucking Christ if this is Ray again.

"Hello?" I said, an annoyed tone to my voice, then realizing I didn't look at the caller ID before answering, feeling like a complete idiot.

The line was quiet for a while, whoever was on the other side of it breathed hesitantly.

I moved my phone from my ear and checked the caller, seeing "xofrnk 💖" appear on my screen. I immediately started screaming internally, and instinctively pressed the end call button.

I sat stunned for a few minutes before literally screaming out loud (I'm sure Mikey could hear) and calling Frank back.

A few rings later, he picked up.

"Uh, hey" I heard him speak, and hearing his voice made tears gather in my eyes.

"Hi Frank, holy shit, er, sorry for hanging up at first, that was... I don't know why I did that actually, but I didn't really mean to" I spoke, my words rushing out without letting me think.

I heard Frank chuckle softly, his voice sounding tired even when laughing. "It's fine, I didn't expect you to pick up at all. And I was the one breathing like a murderer anyways."

I laughed a bit, but after that both of us stayed quiet for a while.

"Well," Frank spoke softly, "there was actually a reason I called, not just to embarrass myself."

"Oh, well what is it?" I asked, feeling my palms sweat.

"Do you...want to meet up with me tomorrow? Since it's Saturday and all. I was hoping we could talk."

___
A/N:

sHIT GUYS SORRY I HAVEN'T UPDATED THIS STORY IN A FEW MONTHS.
I haven't given up on this story at aLL, I just haven't had a great mindset for a while now. I've tried to keep up with all my stories, but my focus just hasn't been on writing. But I still love to write, and I will work on getting this story rolling again! Thank you to everyone who votes and comments on this fic, it reminds me how much I love to write it.

I'll see u all soon, I promise.
xoolives. ♡