Right or Wrong

Chapter 15

Devin
It's been a month, I haven't seen or spoken to Azure. All I do is think about her, I stopped by her house. Her mom told me she wasn't home, which I knew she was, I guess Azure was done foreal. Azure didn't want anything to do with me. I guess I should have cherished her more than I did. I took her for granted and it all got thrown back in my face. I wanted to love Azure it was just Shaquavia wouldn't let me. Shaquavia and I old relationship really put a lock on me. After Shaquavia showed me girls ain't shit, I treated Azure like she wasn't shit and now I lost a good thing. I've tried to make it better, I don't believe in abortions but I asked Shaquavia to do one because Im so over her but she refuses. I can't deal with Shaquavia in my life anymore and I feel this baby is forcing me to stay in her life. I don't want anything to do with Shaquavia or Dre, I lost the best thing that ever happened to me by being so irresponsible, I wish I woulda never picked Shaquavia up from the hospital that day. I wish I could rewind time.

Azure
It's been a little over a month since I last seen Devin, He's been calling and texting me 24/7 I had to block his number. Devin shows up to my house constantly. My mom begs me to speak to him but I just kept telling her to tell him, " Im not home." As much as I love Devin I couldn't deal with him and Shaquavia especially if she's pregnant. Like Shaquavia was already a pain in the ass when she plotted Jr. on Devin. Imagine her now that she's in reality having his baby, I had to break it off which is probably what Shaquavia wanted. The day since I met Devin, Shaquavia was always in the picture, even when you try to crop her out the picture she always finds a way to glue herself back in. I hated Devin for having sex with her but I mostly hated myself for giving him my one most prize possession. I was in love with a man who didn't feel the same. I know you guys are probably like we only been together for 2 months, how could you be in love with him? I been through so much with Devin these past 2 months. He showed me reasons why Reggie didn't deserve me before It got worse. He showed me that good guys still exist, well did exist. He showed me a nigga could care for you and be your homie and bestfriend, when my mom and I got into it and she kicked me out, he was right by my side listening and comforting me, he spoiled me and he didn't throw it back in my face like Reggie did. He didn't take advantage of me. He didn't put his hands on me the only time he put his hands on me was just to cherish my body. Shit plus his sex just topped it all. Devin had me beating bitches ass I barely knew but he always wanted the best for me, he wanted me to work on my attitude. But I guess being loyal, and freaky for your man still won't make a nigga stay. Which goes back to my mom, she warned me so many times and I didn't listen, I wish I could've had the relationship I have with my mom now back then. I wish I coulda told her that I was thinking about having sex and she woulda taught me out of it.I miss Sierra so much, I could imagine myself spilling all this T to her and her telling me how stupid I was for even sticking around after he fucked Shaquavia. Life's pretty good though. I haven't been crying everyday like I use to when I was with Devin. My mom and I relationship is pretty cool. I visit my dad time to time. All though I may have not graduated high school. I'm moving forward to get my GED, I'm doing summer classes to get me prepared.

Shaquavia
Devin doesn't believe in abortion but he asked me to get one and I told him no. I wanted something to keep me attached to Devin and gettin an abortion wasn't the answer. I told Devin im pregnant a month ago and I feel like im in this pregnancy alone, it's been a while now and he calls once every 2 weeks, sends a few texts but that's it. I go through all these stages in the pregnancy alone and it's not like how it was when I was pregnant with Jr. He didn't even stop by to check on me. I'm starting to rethink this abortion.

Azure
It's my first day of summer school, I feel really ashamed that I let boys ruin my senior year. I wasn't going to let that affect me this summer. I walk in class, everyone looks at me. I was kinda shy because I didn't know anyone I felt like I was starting high school all over again. The teacher looks friendly she looked at me and told me to get comfortable. I sat down, I sat away from everybody because I wasn't trying to make new friends I was just trying to get my GED and get out. The bell rings just before the teacher is about to close the door somebody yells, " wait." He walks in 6'3 pure lightskin, with braces, had a thot cut with some nice curly hair and his smile sealed the deal. He was definitely the opposite of Reggie and Devin. Don't get me wrong Devin was a pretty boy but Devin was a pretty boy thug, this boy was more of an innocent pretty boy.
My teacher: " alright get comfortable, find a seat and try not to be late again."
He looks around before he sits down and he decides to sit by me. This nigga smelled so good omg. I'm thinking please don't say anything to me please don't say anything to me. Our teacher gives the class a paper to fill out. 30 minutes into the class he taps me, I look at him and his eyes remind me of Devin so big and brown, I got so lost into his eyes and forgot he was talking. He tapped me again.
Him: "excuse me?"
Me: "what?"
He smiled.
Him: " your paper?"
Me: " oh sorry. Here you go."
I gave him my paper to pass to the front. My teacher then says alright you guys pair up and let's get to know eachother. I just sat in my chair until somebody came up to me. He turns around and says " I'm Trayvon ." Im looking like here we go. "I'm Azure pronounced AS-ER-RAY "
Trayvon: " that's a unique name I never heard of that name before."
Me: " I get that a lot thanks."
Trayvon: "so why are you here?"
Me: "obviously to get my GED."
Trayvon: " alright look check me out you pretty as hell but that black girl attitude shit just makes you ugly, im not for it. Don't think im tryna get with you because im not ."
This nigga just got straight to the point.
Me: " I never said you were trying to get with me."
Trayvon: " then what's the attitude for? Im just trying to get to know you because you don't got no friends and I don't got no friends so fuck it why not be friends?"
We both start laughing
Me: " I apologize."
Trayvon: " it's cool we good."
Our teacher says alright everybody i want you guys to come up one by one and explain what you guys learned about eachother. My teacher calls Trayvon up first.
Everybody giving him googlie eyes and smiles.
Trayvon: " alright I didn't learn much but I learned her name is Azure which is pronounced AS-ER-RAY, that's unique. She is also rude as hell, but pretty."
Everyone laughs.
My teacher says ok Azure your up next.
I smile, "well everybody that's Trayvon, he's very sweet, tall and his smile is to die for."
Everybody starts dramatically clapping, I couldn't even finish my sentence shit I guess they agree.
I continue.
" But he is 100 percent honest he gets straight to the point." The whole class even my teacher looked at me, " what do you mean straight to the point?" "When I say straight to the point he doesn't sugar coat he just tells it as it is, and that's all I learned about Trayvon." Everybody claps again like damn Trayvon better be that fine for them to be doing that. I sit back down.
Trayvon: "so I gotta smile that's to die for?"
Me: " please do not start feeling yourself, take the compliment and say thank you."
Trayvon: " well thank you."
It seems like everyone was sweating Trayvon and Trayvon was sweating me. I like that. After class was over a bunch of girls approached Trayvon, I mean Trayvon was cute don't get me wrong but I didn't think he was Chris Brown cute for all these girls to approach him after school like he's some celebrity or something. I walk out the class, as I'm at the end of the hallway, Trayvon yells my name, " AZURE WAIT UP!!!" I look back annoyed, " what?"
Trayvon: " what's the attitude for?"
Me: " it's not an attitude I just wanna get home."
I lowkey was jealous that he had all these girls all over him.
Trayvon: " I was just asking if you wanted a
a ride home, didn't mean to aggravate you but alright it's cool forget it."
Trayvon walks away.
It was something about Trayvon he didn't chase after me but he wasn't rude he had this vibe where you couldn't stay mad at him because he had this innocent baby face.
Me: " wait Trayvon, im sorry."
Trayvon: " it's cool, still want the ride home?"
Me: " yeah sure."
We walk to his car and I was amazed his license plate said, " TRAY." His seats were all red, drop top Mercedes Benz. I looked at him.
Me: " this all you?"
Trayvon: " yeah this is all me."
I didn't wanna say, " ohh you got money." because then ima look like I ain't never been in nothing nice, which I have been but this was a major upgrade especially for somebody who just got outta high school. We're in the car he plays chief keef " I'm in love with the gwop." I look at him.
Me: "this is my song."
* I turn up the song. *
I get on snapchat, bitch I start feeling like I'm famous my hair blowing in the wind. He looks at me and smiles.
Me: " what you smiling for?"
Trayvon: " oh nothing."
* I start recording myself *
He starts rapping the song out loud and I look at him with this stank look.
Me: "why can I hear you rapping in my snapchat?"
Trayvon: " I can't be in your snapchat?"
Me: " nope not tryna get beat up by your little girlfriends that were all over you today."
Trayvon: " jealous much?"
Me: " jealous over what? I don't want you."
Trayvon: " you the first girl that never found me attractive."
Which was totally a lie because I thought he was so yummy but I didn't want him to know that.
Me: " guess that makes me special."
Trayvon: " I guess it does."
He smiles.
We pull up in front of my house to Devin. Devin is the last person I want to see.
Me: "oh my God" !!!
Trayvon: "you good want me to walk you to the door?"
Me: " oh no it's fine I got this."
Trayvon: " this your boyfriend?"
Me: " no ex, stalker much."
We both start laughing.
Devin approaches the car.
Devin: " oh so this why you been ignoring me?"
I get out the car
Me: " Devin you're obviously drunk go home."
I walk pass him Devin grabs me.
Devin: " so you not gone introduce me to your new nigga?"
Trayvon: " Azure you sure you don't want me to walk you to the door?"
Devin: " nawl she don't need you to walk her to the door."
Trayvon: " ay man I'm talking to Azure not you bruh."
Me: " Devin let me the fuck go."
Devin: " Azure you think I was joking when I said your mine forever and nobody can have you?"
Me: " LET ME GO DEVIN, WHAT PART OF LEAVE ME ALONE DONT YOU UNDERSTAND I WANT NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU."
Trayvon gets out his car.
Trayvon: " I don't think you understand Azure said let her go."
Devin: " what you gone do? tbh lil nigga don't I know you from somewhere? "
Trayvon: " nigga I don't associate with fuck niggas for you to know me from somewhere"
I get in between Trayvon and Devin. I knew what Devin was capable of and I didn't wanna put Trayvon in that position.
Me: " Devin why can't you just move on?"
Devin: " Azure I love you, I want us to finish where we left off."
Me: " what part of I don't want nothing to do with you anymore don't you understand?"
Devin: " if I can't have you nobody else could have you and I fucking mean it."
Devin walks to his car door and slams it at this point I really don't care if Devin was upset or not.