Komorebi

20/20

for those of you who don't know

20/20 is the show where celebs go to have this dramatic, serious, kind of therapeutic interview w/ Oprah or something

btw I just wanna thank y'all for reading! it's a small crowd but y'all are very consistent which I'm grateful for <3

"First of all," Oprah situated herself on the comfortable couch, "This secret is absolutely baffling! How long did you think you could keep this a secret?"

You shrugged, "I didn't even try to keep it a secret until people started to ask questions. Like I wasn't hiding my relationship with Lucky, I just didn't talk about it."

Oprah chuckled, "That's right, you never talked about it."

"No I didn't, I didn't feel like it would be right to do that. He clearly wasn't open about it, so why should I be?"

She nodded, "Yes, that's normal though. It's normal you would have that mindset because you don't want to look like the bitter ex girlfriend."

"Especially since he got engaged."

"So why are you telling us this now? Why are you being open when he isn't." Oprah rested her chin on her hand.

"Everyone knows now," you replied bluntly. "Anyone who has any questions can just watch this and not have to bother me about it."

"Oh so it bothers you?"

"Yes, of course." you bit the inside of your cheek. "We were each other's first...he's the only person I've been in a relationship in, and it's hard for me."

"Even after all this time."

"I know it's wild to say but yes. I will always care for him-"

"Do you still love him?"

You thought about your answer, "I can't, he's getting married."

"Yeah, you can't love him because he's engaged. You can't love him because you've been broken up for years, you can't love him because he was just a high school sweetheart."

"I don't love him." you lied.

"You can't be honest about your feelings because both of you are incredibly famous and this story is just one more thing you can't have power over. No privacy, no nothing."

You teared up, "I don't want to be the one to ruin things for him. I can't make this a pity party for me, that's not what I'm trying to do."

"Do you love Lucky Blue Smith, y/n?"

You wiped away your tears in silence.

"Well," Oprah sighed, "There's the answer."