Once In A Lifetime

Chapter 20: Tracing the Past

"The past is but the beginning of a beginning."-HG Wells
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She was lost, unsure where to go. She wanted to be at her mom's grave, but it's the only place where they could find her. No. She won't go there. Not this time. She had to go somewhere else...in some place where she could find answers to all her questions. She had to start in her birthplace - the hospital.

The hospital records showed only her parents' names and address. Not much to reveal regarding the missing pieces of her life. However, she went to the place as indicated in the address but saw only a small shanty standing  in a vast area of coconut plantation. 

According to some hospital staff, her parents lived in an elegant ancestral house admired by everyone in the town. The Santoses were an influential family known for their wealth and generosity. Their mansion was an insignia of refuge for the underprivileged in the community and neighbouring towns. Such house was nowhere to be found now. When she arrived there, an old woman named Pacing, the one who hold the key to unlock the door leading to the past, met her. When the old woman saw Denise  standing near in front of her,  she was taken aback and could not believed what she saw.

"It's impossible." She whispered to herself as if seeing a ghost whose soul is unrest. Now she's coming back for truth that could give her eternal peace in the grave.  With this thought, she started to cry and said, "Oh Linda, I'm sorry. Please forgive me."

Denise was surprised. But she expected sort of this thing could happen. She politely corrected the old woman. "Excuse me but I'm Luisa Denise Romano and Linda is my mom. Do you know her?"

"Denise?" She came closer to her. She touched her face for a while, then suddenly, she hugged her and said, "It's you. Yes, it's you. I'm so glad to see you Denise."

Denise learned that the old woman was the caretaker of the Santos' mansion and had been her mom's constant companion in the big house.  The woman told her of the fateful incident that caused her mother's death. She was moved to uncontrollable tears when the old woman said,

"Linda was dying. But she desperately held on to her dear life until she was sure the baby would live and survive. She did not die giving birth to you, Denise. She chose to live a little longer amidst terrible pain to give birth to you, even it was not yet the right time for you to live. She did not give up, not yet, until she was sure, you are safe. She was fighting for life in order for you to live.  It was a miracle that she came out from the fire alive, when she was supposed to be dead earlier when she fell."

Manang Pacing's testimony was a complete healing to her guilt-stricken conscience. All her life, she secretly blamed herself thinking she was the very reason why her mom died. Finally, she was free from this guilt. All she had was an admiration for her mom who did not only give her life but as well, love that transcends time and space.

Now, she understood the reason why the legacy of the Santoses were deeply buried, where no one could remember without feeling the miseries of such a great lost. She understood also why the past seemed too bleak, why she had nothing to treasure from the remnants of her beloved mother, not even her memory, or even a family. Everything was taken away from her before she could finally have life. The only thing left is the undying love of a mother that even death could not silence.

And then, she has her Uncle Luis. Manang Pacing told everything about him. She was glad to learn that her mom's only sibling is still alive, although he's unattached to the outside world and living a life of complete isolation. But, Denise was determined to see and meet him at the right time.