Chapter 2

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I stood below the lamppost, alone. As expected, I was the earliest. Kylie and the rest had a bad reputation for making me wait. The loud pump of music from the club was getting me a little warmed up. It wasn’t long before a blue cab pulled over in front of me and the three prettiest girls stepped out; Kylie, Megan and Trena!

We walked into the club hand in hand, already looking for guys. Flashing disco lights made it hard to concentrate, but who was concentrating? One by one, guys came up to them and started hitting on them. Megan was taken away first, followed by Trena, leaving Kylie and me at the bar.

“So how has things been going?”

Deciding not to tell Kylie about Nathan yet, she shrugged and gave a simple “fine”. Kylie was definitely not one of those who could keep secrets especially if they were gossip.

“Can I get you a drink?” A British accented voice whispered in my ear. As I turned, Kylie stood up and walked off, probably to find a guy of her own. Sandy brown hair and dark brown eyes. His small fringe bobbed on his head as he smiled charismatically at me. “Why not?” I asked with a wink. Within minutes, he returned with drinks for both of us and we started chatting. The night was slowly fading away, as we proceeded from chatting to dirty dancing on the disco floor. The liquor was making my head spin, my eyes losing focus on my surroundings. With bits of the present in my mind, I saw myself being taken out of the bar, onto the sidewalk outside.

Being in no position to care for myself, I was helpless. He, whose name I could not even remember, was already taking me to the alley behind the bar. My legs were jelly-like, as though there were no bones in them. My heels were being dragged behind me. “Kyl… Kylie” A deep drowsy voice shocked me, when I realized it was my own. My friends were back in the club, not knowing at all of the state I was in.

My body was being propped up against the wall, being pressed back by the ‘cute’ guy. His liquor breath was next to my lips, puffing down on me. The cold wind blowing in the surrounding air was making my bare legs feel cold and tingly. I felt suffocated as the air around me grew thinner and thinner and my heart rate increased rapidly. Cold hands found themselves on my thigh as his lips found mine. I felt so violated: my body was being used by someone I didn’t even know, someone who did not get permission to so much as touch me. 

He seemed so experienced in this ‘business’ as he placed one at the back of my dress, steadying me and at the same time trying to unzip my already too short dress. Another hand was crawling up my inner thighs. This process was the most uncomfortable that I’ve ever felt. I’m a virgin, mind you. My mind was in a mess. Should I scream? Should I kick him and run? Was that even possible with my heels? His finger inched nearer and nearer as his other hand unhooked my dress’ button successfully. I panicked. “HELP!” I detached my mouth from his momentarily and screamed. He tensed and held my mouth within his.

“Get off you jerk!” my breaths were short and definitely did not get the needed oxygen into my lungs. The guy turned towards the voice as I felt his hair in my face. His arms left as my body collapsed onto the hard and cold pavement with a thud. Pain shot through my knees as I left out a gasp. Despite the pain, I managed to feel the relief of the earlier ‘experience’. “You alright babe?” A deep voice rolled through my ears. The blood in my veins stopped pulsing. My vision became more blurred. I just managed to catch a tiny glimpse of his face: v-shaped, with tiny scars. Deep brown eyes were staring frantically into mine. I was about to reach out my hand to stroke his fringe which just looked ‘oh so adorable’. But unfortunately, I blacked out.

There was a bright light. My legs were tiredly carrying me towards it. No questions were asked. I was alone. My breath was silent, as a broke into a run, then a sprint. Suddenly the scene changed. Nathan. That was the first thought in my mind as I ran through the light. The scene changed again. I stood in the distance, watching a group of children. They were carefree and innocent, particularly a young seven year old child, sitting at the swings. It took me a while, about a minute, to realize that I was staring at my younger self. I had clear brown eyes, which had grown lighter within the years. Nathan… where was he? He was one who never left my side when I was a kid. He wasn’t there. “Nathan, Nathan” I started saying, looking at my younger self and trying to figure out where I was, and where Nathan could be. I was scared, panicking and every single scared emotion there was. Was I going to lose him?

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